There are some debates on whether for teacher to connect with their students have actual effects on having overall benefits for life. It seems quite controversial topic to discuss but, in my opinion, I firmly believe that teacher should build up robust relationship between both of them. This is because this bond can allow students to raise their capacity to learn and makes them more reciprocal.
To begin with, high frequency of communication between teacher and student can motivate students to check their study's environment objectively. This means that teachers have been always being an experts in education field, which point to the fact student can get some useful advices or materials from their tutors to be better leaner. For example, when I was in a high school, I was in a state panic since my history grade that I got from midterm was so miserable. At that time, I visited my teacher's office to resolve my problem I faced. And then, I was so lucky that I could receive some helpful internet web sites's list which I could uncover a number of resources to complement my study. If there were no counselor such as my high school teacher, I would get in trouble failing in the exam at all time.
On top of that, when students is eager to develop their communication skills, it can be useful to create deep-seated connection in the midst of tutors and pupils. In fact, the process that teacher and student consistently have a conversation or interact with each other would paly a big part in advancing their social skills. For instance, I saw a documentary named life assistant last year, which was a story about a juvenile delinquents in a middle school meeting teacher as a real life assistant. She was trapped by unpalatable circumstance, such as poverty, domestic violence or parent's divorce and so forth. Therefore She was stigmatized as a problem child in her school and he also did not have any attitude to overcome the situation. However, her teacher was not just help her to surmount suffering issue but also acted as if she was a member of the student's family. Owing to teacher thoughtful behavior, the girl could go head-to-head to be more strong individual and she could unveil her hidden characteristic, a sense of communicative ability, making the promising future.
To sum up, the more attention and love teacher give to their students, the easier the children find their own aidful aspects for themselves. Without teachers's support, there could be no stimulus for students to study and people who are good at the mutual relationship. In this regard, it is safety to say that teacher should serve as the most cooperative assistant for their students through constant connection.
가끔가다가 주장에 대한 설명이 약간 장황해보이는 경향이 있습니다.
조금 concise하게 쓰고 딱 clear focusing하게 주장 설명 딱딱 하고 끝내는 것도 좋습니다.
어휘 약간씩 반복되는 경향이 있습니다. 더 다양하게 단어 쓰면 훨씬 좋을 것 같습니다.
그리고 conclusion잘 쓰셨습니다. closure잘 한 거 같아요