▶ Your Answer :
Government has their a duty; they should improve their constituents' life quality and they should spend their revenue more effectively. Directly connected to this, the intriguing issue at hand is whether the government's decision is an effective way to spend its money or not. (Mention the problem in advance) Regarding the given statement, I have to say that I think it is not effective way spending the government's money. First of all, the expense of providing all adults of over the age of 25 with training fee is too much. (Too simple) If an adult whose age is over 25 can simply get earn their training fee, what is good for the society to let them have new skills? Of course, many be there would be some benefits would generated from that policy, but when government spend their money, the government should prudently use their revenue since it is collected by citizens. So it has to be used for public good. There are so many urgent social issues that has to be handled; education among the poor, welfare for the disabled and so on. An adult whose age is over 25 can make their way on their own. (Need more explanation) Considering the possible consequences of implementing that decision also supports my position. If the policy were to be forced, the adults over 25 would try to get a high-quality training because it is free anyway. It implies more burden on government finance and waste of money either. The adults would think that they should get an certain training since it is free, not because they need that training. Given the above reasons, I do not think the decision offered in the statement is an effective way of spending the government finance.
채점기준표 | Grammar | Contents | Example | Coherence | 점수 | 2 | 3
| 2 | 3 | Score | Fair 18-23 |
- their constituents' life quality 보다는 the quality of life ~등으로 써주시는 것이 좋습니다. - 인트로에서 문제사항없이 government decision만 언급이되면 문맥에 맞지 않는 내용이 될 수 있습니다. - 토플에서는 and so on로 예를 들기보다는 정확한 예시를 들어주시는 것이 중요합니다. - certain 앞에는 a 를 사용하여 주세요. - 라이팅의 이유는 최소 두 가지 이상으로 잡아주세요.
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