▶ Topic :
It is debatable whether bringing up children
is easy easily for parents than fifty years ago. Some people argue that raising
children is more difficult for parents compared to fifty years ago. However, I
have a different idea. In my opinion, bringing up children is less difficult for
parents than fifty years ago for the following reasons.
First and foremost, a lot of useful
information is available for parents in these days. (What kinds of information?) Many parents can find out
anything they want on the Internet or another mass-media. Moreover, they can discipline
their children with a variety of information, thus they can apply them in their
real life. As a result, learning many tips that are necessary for parents helps a lot of children to be a well-educated person. For example, my nephew who is
growing up from my sister (What does it mean?) can learn how to eat with others in public places and
how to interact with disabled classmates in school. Finally, he can get a lot
of information from his parents, and he could become have a politeness attitude (Does it mean 'polite'?) in
all situation.
In addition, in modern communities have there are a
variety of public places that children can play. The amusement park and areas
for children in department store allow are places for children to play exercise with their
friends and family. From my experience, when I was young, my parent always said say
“These days, we can find out many places that we can play with my son such as
nearby park, and amusement park”. Thus, I could agree with my parent’s opinion,
and I could spend spent an enjoyable time with my family. Eventually, I have learned
how to interact with my parents, and can realize what is the matter of great
importance for me in my future, and life.(Clarify the meaning) My parent had a sense of satisfaction
with respect to that I could grow up to a well-educated person. (Awkward sentence)
Looking at all statements As mentioned above, there are is a
variety of reasons to be considered, but the end of the day, since raising
children in these days not only offers a lot of information easily but also
provides some interesting places for children. I think that bringing up children
is less difficult for parents than fifty years ago.
채점기준표 | Grammar | Contents | Example | Coherence | 점수 | 2 | 2
| 2 | 2 | Score | Limited 10-17 |
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