■ Direction Read the question below. You have 30 minutes to plan, write, and revise your essay. Typically, an effective response will contain a minimum of 300 words. ■ Question Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Use specific reason and examples to support your answer |
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▶ Topic : Nowadays, it is not important for people to have family meals together regularly. |
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▶ Your Answer :
These
days, some people take it for granted that it is not important for families to
share meals regularly and also difficult to eat together with busy family
members. However, contrary to this idea, it is clear that eating together
routinely as a family is extremely significant. The compelling concepts of
stress and a job clearly show this theme.
First
and foremost, having a meal together frequently helps people to alleviate stress.
This is mainly because they can have meaningful conversations and share worries
with their family members in the good atmosphere, which helps them to relax and
clear their mind. This brings a new solution to perplexing and stressful
problems at school or work. Therefore, having family dinner regularly is one of
the best and most effective ways to escape from the harsh reality. For
instance, when I was in high school, I was extremely exhausted and stressed due
to excessive homework. Therefore, my family members and I had dinner at a
French restaurant. While having a family bonding time, I had a brief moment of
relief from my stressful schoolwork. This was because I shared my problems and
worries at school, and got sincere and heartwarming advice from my parents.
In
addition, having family meals regularly is helpful for people’s career. This is
due to the fact that young members can learn good manners and polite
conversation skills by eating with their parents. As modern society has become
increasingly specialized and competitive, today’s companies are looking for
employees having such qualities. Therefore, these are important to fight for
jobs in highly competitive labor markets. For example, my father, the CEO of a
company in Korea, (컴마 필요합니다) often tells me that a job interview typically precedes the
hiring decision. He and other interviewers at the interview mainly look at the
applicants’ passion and manner because politeness helps decrease conflicts
among coworkers. This means that sharing meals with family members is a sure
way for people, especially students, to prepare for the future.
In
conclusion, without any doubt, I firmly believe that sharing family meals is of
great importance and beneficial. The examples of stress and employment support
the argument.
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1. conclusion의 분량을 3문장 이상으로 늘려주세요.
2. 이유 두 가지는 모두 합리적으로 잘 작성된 것 같습니다.
사례도 적절하게 잘 쓰였습니다.
3. 문법도 완벽하게 잘 쓰셨습니다.
수고하셨습니다. *^^*