▶ Your Answer :
It is debatable whether
accepting criticism guarantees one’s success in group work. This is an interesting
question because opinions concerning this issue can be different depending on
the individual perspectives. In my opinion, however, I agree with the statement
that being open to criticism improves their group project for the following two reasons.
First of all,
people should accept criticism from others in a group project because the
ability to handle criticisms broadens people’s perspectives. To be specific,
people many come up with ideas that have been overlooked by others, which as result
allows people to better understand other cultures, lifestyles, and perspectives.(Make meaning clear) As modern society is becoming increasingly globalized, today’s world requires
people with international views. For example, Steve Jobs, who is the founder of
Apple, made great accomplishments in his lifetime. I read online that he was
very successful because he was global-minded and culturally sensitive. He did
this by carefully listening to the opinions of his co-workers and always being
open to criticism in group projects.
In addition, people
must take other people’s criticism to avoid adding pressure on their already
busy schedule. To be specific, developing oneself through by reading books or listening
to lectures consumes a lot of time and energy, which makes people tired and
inefficient but understanding criticism is quick and immediate. Many people today
are busy with their life full of tasks and responsibilities. (Such as?) They can
successfully multitask and stay focused at the same time only if they keep a balance
in their daily lives. For example, when I was a group leader in grade eight, I had
a huge misunderstanding that led to a fight with one of the members in my group.
I decided to not to speak to her until he apologized to me first. However, the
other members suggested me to apologize first. After having a conversation with her, I realized
that this was my fault. Thanks to my member, I could solve the problem faster and
successfully end the group project. Though, this shows that it is necessary to accepting
criticism in order to effectively manage their time.
In conclusion, I
firmly believe that the advantages of accepting feedback far outweigh its
disadvantages for the reasons I have mentioned above.
채점기준표 | Grammar | Contents | Example | Coherence | 점수 | 3 | 2 | 2 | 1 | Score | Limited 10-17 |
- overlooked 되는 아이디어에 관련된 내용은 어떤 것을 말하는 것인가요?
- 스티브 잡스 예시와 group project 의 topic이 잘 매치되지 않습니다. - 친구와의 personal example에서는 어떤 이유로 친구와 싸움을 하게 되었나요? - 두 번째 이유도 첫 번째 이유와 마찬가지로 group project 라는 관련성이 미흡하게 전개되어 있습니다. |
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