It is more important to keep your old friends than it is to make new friends.
Over the course of living, a friend is an essential component (ingredient: 음식의 재료) making our life flourish. Without friendship, we lose the momentum of the life. The issue here is whether it is more significant to maintain old friendship than to search new friendship. In my opinion, I believe that building new relationship with new person is more valuable than sustaining old relationship. The reasons below can greatly substantiate my point of view.
First and foremost, people can find new vitality of the life thorough new friends. New friends possessing different hobbies or interests give people a chance to open eyes to another world. On the other hand, old friends tend to avoid suggesting (avoid + 동사ing 형태입니다) what someone does not like since they already know well about someone's preference over the long time. For instance, I made a new friend who is interested in wine. I have never been familiar with wine before I met him. Plus I thought wine is expensive and it is exclusively for the well-informed person. However I learned about wine from him that it is not that expensive and I enjoy them. Without this new relationship, I would have been probably still drinking Soju with my old friend until now and never experience this pleasure.
Secondly, as the circumstance changes, people should find (fine/find 다릅니다) another friend along with new environment rather than manage to keep old friendship. People encounter a variety of life changes such as moving out of the town, changing job or marriage. In this regard, it is more useful to make new friends since we need partner for our new life circle and challenges, which cannot be given by the old friend unfortunately. My personal experience can exemplify this viewpoint. I left my hometown due to new job, and naturally I could not keep in touch with my old friend who has had a twenty year relationship with me. Although we are still best friends, I made a neighborhood friend to adapt to the new town. My new friend introduced famous restaurants or bars near our neighbor and we enjoyed them.
To sum up, people need to keep changing the relationship and building new friendship for the (관사) two reasons (단/복수) mentioned above. New friends enlighten our view to the world. In addition brand-new relationship refreshes our life. Therefore the importance of making new friends cannot be underestimated in order to make our life happier.
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1. 사소한 문법 오류가 잦은 편입니다. proof-reading을 꼼꼼하게 해주세요.
2. 이유 두 가지는 모두 합리적으로 잘 작성된 것 같습니다.
다만 아쉬운 점이 있다면 사례에서 new friend를 설명하신 것과 비슷하게
old friend의 사례도 주시면 더 내용이 풍성해질 것 같습니다.