▶ Your Answer :
Historically, teachers from wide variety of different areas
have offered valuable lessons to their students. Their contribution encourages
students to push themselves and achieve their full potentials. However, there
is a controversy on whether coaches are the best teachers or not, and I think that
coaches are the best teachers. Two reasons are they have a lot of experiences,
and offer subjective views.
First, sport coaches are usually retired players who had
played that particular sport for a long time. Thus, they have first hand
experience and know-how about that sport, which they can use to help their
players in terms of how to deal with certain situations. To be more specific, coaches
can get guild help students to avoid any unnecessary mistakes or to master certain
skills. Without the help from coaches, players cannot fully master their
skills. Besides the mastering the skill and know-how, coaches can tell the
students about how to approach sports mentally. appropriate attitude, and
mindset during the matches, which are crucial part that coaches often offer to their
players.(Separate reason 이므로 별도의 paragraph + example이 제시되야 할 수 있습니다. 이럴 경우 코치들이 실전게임에 필요한 지식과 마인드셋을 알려준다는 것을 앞단에 우선 명시한 후 현재 내용을 서술해서 1가지 이유로 통일된 논리적인 Paragraph가 될 수 있게 해 주세요.)
Second, coaches contribute students to have an objective(객관적인) view to analyze the situation. If players do
not have coaches, they would have no way to accurately evaluate their performance. Thus, players would be stuck in their own world. In contrast, if coaches were
present, they would offer the constructive criticism that is reliable if their
players are not playing right. Objective views are important to enhance
players’ ability. For instance, I practiced tennis without coaches. Later,
I figured out that my pose was not right. I did not notice that until I had
lessons with certified coaches. I originally thought that my forehand skills
were improving, but it turned out they were not.
Finally, some might argue that having coaches are
not very helpful, but I think that coaches offer invaluable lessons to their
players. They not only teach students about physical skills and right mindset
but also provide reliable feedback about their performance.
Writing 0–30 score scale: Limited (1-16) / Fair (17-23) / Good (24–30)
ADDRESSING TOPIC
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ORGANIZATION
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PROGRESSION AND COHERENCE
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LANGUAGE USE
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GRAMMAR
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GOOD
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GOOD
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FAIR
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FAIR
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FAIR
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각 카테고리별 SCORE: LIMITED / FAIR / GOOD
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- Objective:객관적인 / Subjective: 주관적인 입니다. 자신만의 view 를 가지게 해준다고 할 경우 distinctive way to perceive the situation and analyze the problem 등 다른 표현을 사용해주세요. |