Some people prefer to work for a large company. Others prefer to work for a small company. Which would you prefer? Use specific reasons details to support your choice.
*진하게 표시한 부분은 제가 파악한 문단의 주요 내용이니 참고하세요^^
Some people say says working for a smaller small company has advantages over working for a large company because people can have more influence on his/her own company and get more opportunity to become a key person in smaller company. But in my opinion, I think that working in a large company is better than smaller one. 주제와 나의 입장을 간결하게 잘 설명한 서론입니다. small company에서 일하는 장점을 간략하게 언급한 부분도 좋습니다. 서론에서 내가 large company에서 일하는 것이 더 좋다고 생각하는 이유(본론에서 제시할 2가지 근거)를 간단하게 단어 수준으로 먼저 제시해주는 것도 좋습니다.
Firstly, large companies are more stable. Although we do not work only for money, we should admit that money is one of the top priorities that we work for. So Thus, (so, but 등과 같은 구어체표현보다는 therefore, thus, however와 같은 문어체 표현을 사용하는 것이 더 적절합니다.) it is very important condition that we can concentrate on our work without concerning about the presence of the company. These days, world economy is under extremely unsettled situation and due to the low stability, small companies are subject to are more likely to suffer from many financial crisis which often results to in the demise of the company. It would be a little better for younger employees to get another job, but the situation will be completely different for seniors. But In this regard, large companies are often backed up by other companies in the same group and that provides high stability with the company. 나의 입장을 뒷받침하기에 타당한 근거와 설명입니다. 설명에 이어 나의 주장을 예증해줄 수 있는 경험담이나 연구결과, 보도자료 등을 가공해서 제시해주세요.
Secondly, more educational opportunities are provided to the employees in larger companies. Thanks to the abundance of workforces and budget, large companies can provide training and educational courses to their workers whereas smaller companies cannot. 교육프로그램을 통해서 직원들이 갖는 장점이 무엇인지 함께 설명해주세요. (ex. work performance 측면에서 productivity를 높일 수 있고, 자기계발 측면에서도 broaden view of life할 수 있다.) For example, I have a friend who work for a small trading company. He always wanted to go abroad to learn Spanish because he worked with Spanish buyers and had many difficulties in communication with them. But in a nutshell he couldn't (could not으로 풀어주는 것이 더 좋습니다. cannot, is not도 마찬가지입니다.) make it because the company couldn't afford the tuition fee and there were was no person to replace him while he is out. On the contrary, one of my other friend another friend, working in large company, had comparably much more opportunities to get education for company's benefit. He is currently attending the graduate school in United States for his master's degree through his company's support. 주장을 뒷받침하기에 알맞은 내용의 사례입니다. 이러한 사례가 주장과 관련해서 어떤 점을 보여주는지 해석하는 문장을 덧붙여서 문단 마무리지어주세요.
In conclusion, I insist that working for a large company has many benefits over working for a small company. This conclusion is based on the stability of the company and the education opportunities given by the employer.
논제에 대한 나의 입장을 뒷받침하기에 타당한 근거들을 잘 생각해주셨습니다. 가능한 body1에서도 나의 주장을 뒷받침할 수 있는 사례를 함께 제시해서 내용 보완해주세요. 에세이 문제 자체에서 Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.라면서 예증 자체를 요구하기도 하니까요. 예증이 보완되면 충분히 fair 이상의 레벨도 받으실 수 있을 거예요^^ 문법 오류 체크해주세요. 코멘트 참고하셔서 내용 수정보완해주시기 바랍니다. 수고 많으셨습니다^^ 화이팅!