▶ Your Answer :
Some people think that the best movies are those that provide about real life while other people think that differently. Both sides may have their own reasons to support their views, If I have to choose one, I would say that films that provide lessons about real life cannot be the best movies. There are several reasons and examples as follow. First of all, viewing movies that does not based base on real life problems is a great way to relieve stress. People these days have a variety of factors in their lifes lives that cause them to worry, such as school, jobs, and personal relationships. There These types of movies help us forget about these real life issues. For instance, I recently felt a lot of stress when I was studying for my final exams. Even during times when I was not actually studying, I found myself worrying about tests and I was unable to completely relax. So I decided to take a study break one day and watch watched one of my favorite fantasy movies, The chronicles of Nanria Narnia. For almost three hours, I completely forgot about the exams and lost myself in the movie. When the film was finished, I felt a lot better. On top of that, even films that teach us real life lessons can be misleading. In fact, movies based on real events are still fictional and dramatic. This means that the movie’s description about real world people and events are often inaccurate, so audiences may have false impressions from the movies. According to a study that was conducted by researchers, movies that describe Muslims as violent and dangerous, which encourages negative stereotypes about them. This can lead to anti-Islams sentiment in society. Moreover, this false descriptions about Islams may cause people to have biased opinions about Muslims In brief, I firmly believe that the disadvantages of viewing movies that offer people real world lessons far weigh its advantages for the reasons I have mentioned before. All in all, the importance of the watching movies that not based on real life cannot be underestimated in one’s life. Good: 24~30 점수: 25 일단 대채로 구조적으로 잘 서술한 에세이입니다. 특히 문법적 오류도 많이 없고요. 독립형 에세이에서 가장 중요한 부분은 본인의 에세이를 통해서 상대망을 설득 할 수 있냐 입니다. 이러한 면에 있어서는 이 에세이는 가장 적합한거 같습니다. 이유는 각 바디의 예시들이 이유를 잘 서포트 하고 있습니다. 또한 문제가 되는 부분이 있습니다. 두 번재 바디에서 that절이 너무 많습니다. That으로 장황하게 서술하는 것 보다는 간결하게 본인의 의견을 전달하는 것이 좋을거 같습니다. 수고많으셨습니다.
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