■ Direction Read the question below. You have 30 minutes to plan, write, and revise your essay. Typically, an effective response will contain a minimum of 300 words. ■ Question Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Use specific reason and examples to support your answer |
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▶ Topic : In general, people are living longer now. Discuss the causes of this phenomenon. Use specific reasons and details to develop your essay. |
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▶ Your Answer :
An intriguing topic of discussion at hand is how people can live longer than the past. It may seem true that there is not any specific reason for longer lives; however, there appears to be too much absurdity to argue that the aforementioned statement is true. Although some people hold different ideas and opinions, I personally insist that there are two main reasons for living longer: progress of science and wealthier lives. To begin with, science can facilitate people to investigate the cause of diseases. As time goes by, science has been developed much faster and scientists have researched for curing diseases. Compared to the past, doctors can save a number of people who got a cancer, or other fatal diseases. Indeed, a survey conducted by the Gallup Korea suggests that this phenomenon is prevalent in Korean society. The group surveyed ten thousand of Korean CEO between age forty and sixty along with questionnaires. Furthermore, in-depth interviews with a thousand participants show almost ninety percentages of people acknowledging that the percentages of survival rates of their patients have been increased. They also admitted that development of science has a huge impact of that result. Clearly, this survey demonstrates that science provides positive effects to people in pursuing healthier lives. On top of that, wealthiness affects people's attention for health. In the past, people had not enough time to pay attention to their health because they had to make money for everyday food. They could not think of their health or unnecessary items, especially after the World Wars. These days, however, people have become more wealthier than before, and they have enough time to heed to their body. Furthermore, media helps them approach knowledge of health care. A study was conducted by the Institute of Korean Sociopolitical Studies(IKSS), to determined whether wealthiness could affect level of knowledge in health. Two countries were monitored; one was a developed country and another a poor country. Residents of two regions were asked for questions in health care, and the researchers recorded that the former got much better score than the latter. The latter group answered that they could not find information about such topic because they work for many hours. This result illustrates that wealthiness can affect their lives in better ways. To sum up, taking developed science and richer lives into consideration, it is reasonable to claim that those factors affect higher life expectancy.
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평소보다 쓰는데 조금 오래 걸렸네요... 항상 감사합니다.