▶ Your Answer :
Some people think that it is better to learn many skills than to specialize in one skill if people want to succeed while, other people think that differently. Both sides may have their own reasons to support their views, If I have to choose one, I would say that it is better to have diverse skills than have only one specialized skills. There are several reasons and examples as follow. First of all, people who have developed various skills have more financial opportunities. They can benefit financially by utilizing their different abilities in various fields. One method to do this way is to have more than one job. For example, my cousin has computer license and he is good at playing the piano. His formal job is computer expert and he also earns additional income from playing the piano in private party or jazz bars on his weekends. Because my cousin has diverse abilities, he can have much more chance to get money. On top of that, modern society regards versatile people more valuable. This is because today’s world is changing has changed rapidly and well-rounded individuals have more chance to adapt to this circumstance. According to a poll conducted by researchers, 73 percent of American enterprises strongly prefer versatile people rather than people who have one skilled ability. The reason is that as company develops new business ways, person who can do well in variety of environments will be needed. The poll means that developing more than one ability is critical to succeed today. In brief, I firmly believe that the advantages of having a lot of skills far weigh its disadvantages for the reason I have mentioned before. All in all, the importance of having a lot of skills cannot be underestimated in succeeding today. Good: 24~30 점수: 24 전체적으로 매끄럽게 잘 서술하였습니다. 각 바디의 예시가 이유를 잘 서포트 하고 있고요. 하지만 아쉬운 부분이 있습니다. 아쉬운 부분은 핵심내용이 빠진 거 같다라는 느낌이 듭니다. 바디들의 내용이 짧기 대문에 구체적인 설명이 빈약해 보입니다. 좀 더 구체적인 내용을 더 하여서 각 바디의 질을 높이는 것이 좋은 점수를 받는데에 있어 더 좋을 거 같습니다. 수고많으셨습니다? |