Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? University athletic departments should receive the same amount of funding as university libraries. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answers. |
형편 없습니다. 시간도 못 맞춰서, 40분 정도 걸렸습니다. 첨삭 부탁드립니다. (바쁘시다면, weird한 표현이나, 문법 실수라도 좀 집어주세요.) 부탁드립니다.
Although university looks a non-profit organization, it is evident that university is run by money from donations and student’s tuition fees. So, distribution of funds to each department would often be a problem. If I were a fund manager in a university, I will strongly support an athletic department because they require much more money than other departments, and sports team of university has a important role in student’s school life. To begin with, sports teams in universities have a pivotal role to their students and faculties. In other words, students’ mood and passion during school year is dependent on their sports team’s results. From my experience, I study in the Korea University, and we have huge sports matches with Yon-sei University, which is a rival of Korea University, on every September. On the day, we have five sports matches, baseball, soccer, rugby, basketball and ice hockey. If our sports team won more than three games, it makes us so happy, and we could feel a pride of my university. Even, long after the event was finished, we often talk about the victory and enjoy the win. Like my experience, the role of sports team in universities is very important to students, faculties and even alumni. So, given the choice between the athletic department and libraries, I compellingly provide much more funds to athletic department. On top of that, another reason why I provide more funds to athletic department than the libraries is that simply, they need more money. To be specific, an athletic department has many sports groups, such as basketball team, football team, baseball team and so on. Besides that, especially football team has, at least, more than twenty players. So, to support all players they should have enough money as well as other universities’ teams. Besides, it is evident that the more amount of money invested in, the better result will be. Naturally, if sports team in universities get better results, their students and faculties will work better. For this reason, I insist that athletic department should receive more funds than other departments. Some people may be opposed to my idea, however, I still believe that sports division should receive more money than university libraries. In sum, good results of university sports team will encourage their students and faculties work better, and they need more financial aid than other departments. For these reasons, I disagree that the university athletic department should receive the same amount of money with those libraries.
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