It has been argued among many people whether the older people enjoy life less than young people or not. Although it is true that older peoplesenior citizens(나이들 사람을 표현할 때 senior citizes 또는 the elderly도 괜찮은 표현입니다.) supported by financiallymoeny(financially는 부사라 by 뒤에 오기에 적절해 보이지 않습니다.) and time, but(앞 문장에 although가 있기 때문에 쓰지 말아야 합니다.) I agree withthat(뒤에 문장이 나오기 때문에 with가 아닌 that이 와야 합니다.) the young peopleyoungster(youngster나 youths 이런 표현도 괜찮습니다.) enjoy life more than older people. This is because the young people are familiar with advance of technologyadvanced technology and healthier than elders.
Most of all, older people hashave limit to enjoy their life better than younger. Of course, the older people exercise more than young people in order to keep up their health and expand life span, but elder have never same health conditions as well as younger’s. For example, I was shopping with my mother a couple of months ago. Both my mom and I are a type of person who really enjoyed to shop in department. I usually took more than 4 hours to look around there such as exploreing all section of clothes brand shops or shoes and eating some snacks. However, my mother was forced to(어쩔 수 없이라는 뜻입니다) stop to shopshopping(to shop은 쇼핑을 하기 위해 멈추는 것이고 shopping은 쇼핑하는 것을 멈춘다는 의미입니다.) only after 1 hour. This is due to the fact that even if she excise harder than me, she’sher age and body conditions restrict her to do outdoor activities. This indicates that health limitation discourage elder people from enjoying outdoor activities.
Moreover, young people are more familiar with advance of technology like internetthe Internet(인터넷의 i는 항상 대문자이고 앞에 the가 붙습니다.) or play video games.(or 앞뒤는 같은 형식의 구나 절이 와야 합니다.) This reason is that young people it is easy for young people to adapt in this fast change and complicated society. (young people의 동사가 없어서 it을 가주어로 하는 문장을 만들었습니다.) This implies that older people lessare rarely (노인들이 노출되는 것이기 때문에 수동태를 써야 하고 less 대신 빈도부사가 와야 될 거 같네요.) exposed to modern technology and limited things to do. For instance, my grandmother has been a hard time to changing(~하는데 어려운 시간을 가지다는 have a hard time ~ing) her attitudes that are more likely to be against(새로운 세대가 되는 것에 저항하는 그녀의 태도가 되어야 문장의 의미가 자연스러울 것 같습니다.) new generation in order to adapt in this fast change modern society. So, she asked me how to searching the Internet for information and how to send email to neighbor people.(의미를 좀더 보충했습니다.) I taught her how to type, make her personal ID to access the Internet site, and process of sending email for more than 3 months. I taught how to typing, make her personal ID to access Internet site, and process of sending email. However, she has forgotten after few seconds later and then she gave up learning. Also, she spent her rest life the rest of her life(이 표현이 더 적절해 보입니다.) normally doing householdshousehold chores or nothing to do. In this sense, older people have shallow knowledgedifficulty to adjusting new development of technology and spending their life on efficiency. (have difficulty ~ing는 have a hard time ~ing와 같은 의미입니다.)
In conclusion, I agree with the statement(없어도 괞찮아 보입니다.) that young people find pressure life more than older on behalf(의미 파악이 안 되네요) the reasons that I mentioned above: they are healthier and exposed more new technology rather than older. Therefore, older people have lots of limitation to enjoy their life than younger.
끝났네요. 도움이 되면 좋겠습니다. ^^