▶ Your Answer : 29분 / 313
Advertising is playing an important role these days. People are exposed unconsciously to at least 50 advertisements in various places. They make people want to spend their money in two ways; sympathy and conviction. First of all, people feel sympathy on an advertisement which stimulates their interest. These days, it is no exaggeration to say that advertising is a significant strategy on increasing profits of a company. For this reason, many companies devote their energies to creating attractive advertisements. When I worked as a communication officer in an advertising company, I was in charge of designing a donating event. The event was held for the first time in South Korea. I had to produce a material that people can understand why we donate. By setting a proper concept and message, people started to have an interest on our event. As a result, a lot of participants showed up with a sympathy on why we donate. Second, a final purpose of advertising is reaching to a stage of conviction. People are usually convinced by an advertisement why they need a product. If people have a sympathy on it, it is a matter of time to be convinced.(표현이 어색하네요) They don’t even think of it casually, however advertising attracts them as if it is a necessary.(run-on-sentence 입니다) A few years ago, I was looking for a vacuum and there were many kinds of vacuums. Some of them had only one function, vacuuming. Other had lots of functions which were unnecessary to me. However, my mind was filled with conviction as if I will use the needless functions.(여기도 어감이 어색합니다) Thus, I should spend spent more money that than I expected. A lot of Advertisements are created to touch people’s hearts so that they act what the advertisements want. Especially, we are exposed by many of them while out of awareness. Therefore, we can easily be influenced by the sympathy and conviction attack.
예상점수: 24-27 총평: 글을 잘 쓰셨는데 어감이 어색한 부분이 많아요.이런 어색한 표현들을 다시 한번 읽어보시고 수정하시기 바랍니다. 이유도 첫번째는 괜찮은데 두번째는 조금 더 설명이 필요한 것 같습니다. 수고 많으셨습니다. |