'Work that pays well or work that is enjoyable?'Many people (tend to) hesitates when they answer this question.However, I think paying well is more important than enjoying.
First, I must support my family.If I receive good salary, I can make my family happy.For instance, I can send my children to a good educational facility.I think that educateing my children is very important for their future.In Orient, moreover, filial piety is very significant.Therefore to support my parents, I should have enough money.Also, good salary guarantees comfort for my family.For example, I can buy good home appliances , a big house. (if you make sentences more diverse, it would be better!)
Secondly, I can spend my old age enjoy my senior days comfortably.If I have much a lot of assets, I can live in the place where I want, I can and travel many places.I think that spend my old age enjoy my senior days comfortably is very important because I can't earn money in my old age. So gathering money for my old age is significant.I like to travel very much.However, I don't have enough time to travel in my middle age because of work.So I think travel in old age is very ideal. (your sentences tend to be too short; try to make them together depending on their proper meaning.)
In third, I have leeway to enjoy my hobby.Person who is in a financial difficulty can't enjoy his or her hobby.I think enjoying a hobby is very important.(this type of sentence appear several times... why don't you try other forms?) Hobbies make me relaxed.When I enjoy my hobby, I feel very pleasant and I can remove my stresses.
In conclusion, I think financial leeway is very important because of my opinions above.
(weak conclusion... make it longer and more comprehensive...) |