▶ Your Answer : There might be some people who believe that television has much more influence on humankind than the Internet does. However, I personally disagree with above idea. The Internet allows modern citizens to do everything by using this, including watching videos.
First of all, information is conveyed more effectively on the Internet. People today can share and update a lot of helpful information anywhere and anytime if they possess personal computers or smartphones with Internet connection. Let me bring up my personal story as an example. I always communicate with not only my friends and family but also unknowns on SNS. In general, I like to post photos on my Instagram account and look others' pictures also. I can do this interesting thing whenever and wherever, if the Internet is installed. Additonally, I write comments below their photos and I click "Like", it enables me to communicate with other netizens around the world. Even almost of my friends have same behavior like me, this is due to the fact that the Internet allows us to have instant and multiple communication easily.
Secondly, television is losing ground these days. What this means is that people nowadays do not find that they should buy television in their home. Because they can watch broadcasting through smpartphones or computers based on the Internet. According to a recent research done by Seoul National University, over 65% of respondents said that they do not possess television in their home. They replied that buying television is a waste of money. This ies because they prefer to watch videos or broadcasts on Youtube by using their smartphones or personal computers. Moreover, some of them thought that there are more exciting things than just watching television, such as chatting with friends on Facebook or playing online games. These show that as the Internet has been developed, people nowadays can do more interesting things than spending time on watching television.
In conclusion, the Internet offers helpful information more efficiently and television has had less value since the Internet was developed. In this regard, I strongly believe that the Internet much more influences on human community than television does. Good: 24~30 점수: 26 잘 서술된 독립형 에세이입니다. 지금 이 에세이를 통하여서 왜 우리가 인터넷이 삶에 좋은 영향을 주었는지 잘 알 수 있었습니다. 이러한 부분이 중요한 이유는 전체적으로 설득력을 높여 주기 때문입니다. 독립형 에세이에서 설득력이 중요한 이유는 이 에세이를 통하여서 무슨 말을 하려고 하는 거에 있어서 좋은 역활을 하기 때문입니다. 지금 이 에세이 같은 경우는 각 단락에 예시나 설명들이 이유를 잘 서포트 하고 잇습니다. 수고많으셨습니다.
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