▶ Your Answer : Some people think that moving to a new city or country is not a good idea because they will lose their old friends. However, I argue that moving to a new city or country doesn’t does not make people lose their old friends. This is because, less gatherings do not mean they’re not friends anymore and there are many indirect opportunities for friends to meet each other. for the following two subsequent reasons. Firstly, I believe that less gatherings do not mean they’re not friends anymore. It is true that moving to a new city or country decreases time with friends. However, friendship is not related with the number of meetings but related with their mind toward each other. For example, I moved from Songpa-gu to Nowon-gu when I was 16 years old. As I moved to another place, I couldn't get along with my middle school classmates. Though I have lost connections with my old friends for 4 years, they messaged to me when I was 20 and greeted me same as 4 years ago. Secondly, I contends that there are many indirect opportunities for friends to meet each other. Many IT technologies developed during modern time. People can connect with their families and friends by messengers like Facetime, Skype, and Kakaotalk, etc, no matter where they are. For instance, I got a Peruvian friend, whose name is Jett by our university’s exchange program. He went back to his country after 6 months exchange program in Korea. Despite of the fact he and I are in different continent, we contact regularly by Facetime and keep our friendship firmly. To sum up, I disagree with the idea that moving to a new city or country is not a good idea because you will lose your old friends for the following reasons: less gathering do not mean they’re not friends anymore and there are many indirect opportunities for friends to meet each other. Good: 24~30 점수: 26 잘 서술된 독립형 에세이입니다. 독립형 에세이에 있어서 가장 중요한 부분을 차지하는 것은 설득력이 있나 입니다. 설득력이 중요한 이유는 주제에 대한 본인의 의견을 서술하는 것이기 때문에 이러한 부분이 필요합니다. 지금 이 에세이 같은 경우에는 각 단락에서의 구체적인 설명과 적절한 예시 사용으로 인해 잘 서술되었습니다. 수고많으셨습니다. |