▶ Your Answer : Some people think we should tell friend to get assist from a teacher for saving our time to save our time. However, in my opinion, helping a friend to understand the subject contents is useful to me eventually for the following two subsequent reasons. for the following two subsequent reasons.
First of all, social relationship is essential. Nowadays, social relationship is as important as career compared to the past important in career in comparison to the past. This is because, along with your ability, you can have people who lend you a hand when you are in trouble Along with one's ability, one can help people when someone is in trouble. (독립형 에세이에서는 you를 서술하면 안됩니다). Moreover, you can broaden your social relationship through those who were helped helpers. In this sense, having a great relationship by assisting your friend is beneficial concerning your future. For example, when I was freshmen in college, unfriendly senior asked me a help for final exam since I was good at marketing subject. I surely helped him and he really thanked to me. Next semester, when I had a difficult to understanding economy subjects, he gave a material to help understanding.
Second, It will conducive to have a great academic performance to each other. Supposed that you help those who are not good at the subjects. By giving a assist, you can recalled but also review the contents of subject recall the content of the subject. This must lead to a great help your academic performace. To give an my anecdote, When I was in high school, my frineds had a trouble in understanding a math subject. I just helped her as a friend, during that time, I could remind and study again the concept of math through it. As a result, We got a great grade at the final exam. To sum up, helping a friend at a subject is usefurl concerning to your social relationship and academic performace. In this regard, I firmly hold that assisting a friend for studying is a must for the reasons I mentioned above.
점수: 20 일단 철자적 오류들이 너무 많습니다. 철자적 오류는 에세이를 서술하고 난 후에 꼭 proofreading을 하시길 바랍니다. 정검을 하다 보면 본인이 어디서 철자적인 문제가 나타는 지를 알 수 있습니다. 또한 독립형 에세이에서는 구어체를 서술하면 안됩니다. 주어를 you로 안 서술하려고 노력하길 바랍니다. 또한 어색한 표현들이 많습니다. 이러한 표현들은 에세이로 하여금 플로우를 방해하기 때문에 주의하면서 서술하시길 바랍니다. 수고많으셨습니다. |