■ Direction You have 20 minutes to plan and write your response. Your response will be judged on the basis of The quality of writing and on how well your response presents the points in the lecture and the relationship to the reading passage. Typically, an effective response will be 150 to 225 words. ■ Question Summarize the points made in the lecture you just heard, explaining how they cast doubt on the points made in the reading
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▶ Your Answer : Finally, the professor contends that the assertion concerning contained collagen is flawed. The recent evidence shows an an opposing view for not coming from t-rex but, maybe other, who are handing the board. This contradicts the idea presented in the reading passage that collagen was same type of biochemical material, where they find in association with bone tissue. The speaker points out in the passage are skeptical.
(문단 순서가 바뀐건가요?? Finally이 제일 처음으로 온 게 맞는건가요?)
(Introduction과 Conclusion이 없습니다. 에세이에 있어서 굉장히 중요한 요소이니 꼭 추가해주세요.) First of all, The speaker argues that the maintenance regarding small branching channels is wrong as they hard to see as a blood vessel. (도대체 무슨 뜻인가요? channels를 뭘로 regard한다는 건가요?) It's a feat of bacteria. Research identifies that soft and moisture (명사가 필요합니다 수식어만 나와있어요) may be left by colony. This goes against the writer's view that the presence of soft, malleable organic substance was inside the channel.
Second, The lecturer points out that the claim regarding red blood cell is mistaken. (the claim이 어떤 건지에 대한 설명이 필요합니다.) The evidence shows an opposing view that they have not been remaining blood cells, therefore, it probably came from a different origin. In addition, since know (know에 대한 주어가 누구인가요?) there have been never found more than 1000 years. However, 7000 years is improbable. This goes against the writer's view that spheres had dark red centers and the similar size as (similar은 with보다는 as와 함께 써주세요.) blood cells.
Finally, the professor contends that the assertion concerning contained collagen is flawed. The recent evidence shows an an opposing view for not coming from t-rex but, maybe other, who are handing the board. This contradicts the idea presented in the reading passage that collagen was the (관사) same type of biochemical materials (단복수), where they (they가 누구인가요?) find in association with bone tissues. |
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1. 각 문단 시작 전에 tab 버튼 눌러서 들여쓰기 해주세요.
2. 철자 오류가 잦은 편입니다. 심한 감점의 요인이 될 수 있으니, 에세이 작성을 마치시고 꼼꼼히 검토해주세요.
3. reading and listening의 비율이 너무 listening쪽으로만 치우쳐져 있습니다.
비율은 5:5, 적어도 6:4 정도는 되어야 합니다.
이는 리딩에 대한 디테일 부족으로 이어지며, 분량 부족, 추가 설명 실패 등으로 이어질 수 있으니
리딩에서도 evidence를 많이 찾아서 써주시면 좋을 것 같습니다.
4. 문법이 너무 어지러운 상태입니다.
아직은 에세이 쓰실 단계는 아닌 거 같고 문장 단위로 영작을 먼저 연습해주세요.
수고하셨습니다. *^^*