평가 부탁드립니다.
We are familiar with news media as reading newspaper every morning and watching news on television every night. Thus, we get most information through this media. However, how can these media be credible? Although news media seems to be unbiased, it is not reliable. There are two reasons that news media have deep relationship with interests and have a tendency to stimulate the public.
~this media~ 그 전 문장에서 두가지 수단을 언급하셨을 경우에는 끝까지 복수로 밀고 나가주세요. ~these media~로요.
~news media have~ that 구절이기는 하지만 이때도 언제나 3인칭의 법칙은 적용됩니다. ~news media has~겠죠.
First of all, news media are involved in many interest groups. When some interest groups are against others, they try to make the public their sides. In this case, benevolent news could be helpful to attract the public. It can be a good example that presidential candidates want to provide good image for people through news media. As a result, the candidates try to make good news, which causes biased news. Really, some papers sometimes announce their position in the president elections. Companies are concerned about news media because news that media delivers could affect on their interest. Therefore, they intend to hide negative information to news media, and news media just deliver positive aspects of the companies.
우와.. >_< 이 문단은 정말 어떻게 찝어낼(?)데가 없네요!! 허허..문법적으로는 (물론 저도 많이 틀립니다 ㅠ_ㅠ) 제 눈에는 깨끗하게 맞아 보입니다!
In addition, the contents of news media are more sensational than the real lives. If their contents are more popular, they can entice more advertisements. Thus, news media try to attract the public, they try to differentiate other contents. It causes news media to exaggerate or distort original information. For instance, some news media deliver unconvinced information about the celebrities. We call this case as scandal. Although the celebrities interview about many interests, news media choose the most sensational contents in the interview. People who read about the article only know limited parts, not overall. As a result, news media sometimes creates misunderstanding about the celebrities.
~real lives~ 실생활에서라는 표현을 하고 싶으실 때도 그냥 ~real life~라고 복수형 빼고 하셔도 됩니다. lives는 주로 살아있는 생물의 목숨을 셀때 이용됩니다.
~news media try~ 잊지마세요, 3인칭! ~news media tries~로! 그리고 그 문장. 콤마로 두 문장을 나누어 주신 것은 좋은데, 두 문장이 전부 다 complete sentence 입니다. 이때는 콤마로 이을 수 없고 접속사가 필요합니다. 콤마 를 빼고 and를 넣어주셔도 같은 의미로 지속되겠네요.
To summarize, we cannot believe news media without any doubt for the reason that I have mentioned above. Therefore, we should have in critical minds as reading newspaper or watching news on television.
~for the reason~ 두가지 이유가 있었었죠? for the reasons로 바꿉시다.
~...as reading...~ 제생각엔 as 보단 when we are를 넣어서 넓혀주는게 맞을 것 같아요.
와, 엄청난 문법의 소유자시군요. 저도 아직 토플을 준비하고 있는 터라 어떻게 비법같은 것을 전수해 드릴 순 없고 그냥 짧은 지식으로나마 도움이 되드렸으면 좋겠네요. 화이팅~^^;