▶ Topic : 동의하는지 안하는지
-전 세계에서 일어나는 사건들에 관심을 가져야 한다. 비록 그것들이 우리에게 영향을 미치지 않더라도
Many people think that they don't do not (에세이에서는 줄인말을 서술하면 안됩니다) have to know about events all around the world, if the events have nothing to with themselves. They say that it is waste of time and useless for them to find and learn a lot of events in other countries. However, in my opinion, it is desirable to learning global events for following two subsequent reasons. learn global events for the following two subsequent reasons.
To begin with, to know knowing information about other countries' policy, society, and economics will help people to have many precious knowledge. They can use their understanding when they have to study or investigate something about other countries. Also when they travel to abroad, they would enjoy more because they know a lot of information about the nation they would visit. For example, I have visited the Thailand a year ago with my father. At that time, my father didn't know anything about there. However, I had studied about the Thailand's climate, culture, and food because of assignment of class in university. Fortunately, I could guide my father and explain many things about the Thailand. And I and my father was more excited because we could know a lot of hidden background about the Thailand in our travel.
On top of that, we can know how to do in the same situation. Someday we would meet similar situations which occurred in other nations. So we could prepare and would not be embarrassed. There are a lot of possibilities that the event occurring in a nation would appear in other nation. For example, I saw an another country's severe demonstration against the government policy on the news. And it occurred to me when I was a university student. There was a strong demonstration against the principal's wrong educational policies. Thanks to the news, I could behave calmly, and finished my role in the demonstration. Also we made the principal to give up his statue. It was very proud event for me and I could get a lot of help from the global events.
In a nut shell, by understanding and learning about events all around the world, we could have a lot of useful knowledge and prepare for the same situation in our nation. For these reason, I think it is better to know and have interests in world's big events.
Good;24~30 점수: 26 일단 줄인말을 서술하시면 안됩니다. 독립형 에세이에서는 줄인말을 안 쓰는 것을 노력하시길 바랍니다. 이 부분 이외에는 잘 서술된 독립형 에세이인거 같습니다. 이 에세이를 통하여서 왜 우리가 다른 나라에서 일어나는 일들을 알아야하는 지를 상세하게 잘 설명해 주고 있는 거 같습니다. 이러한 설명들 덕분에 전체적으로 에세이가 아주 논리적이고 매끄럽게 잘 서술된 거 같습니다. 수고많으셨습니다. |