▶ Your Answer :
In
the reading passage, there is ample support for the author’s claim that the
unique ecosystem and its wild inhabitants in the Everglades are being ruined
owing to environmental troubles. However, the professor in the lecture gives several
reasons as a rebuttal to the author’s points.
First, the professor contends that chemicals
from fertilizers led to water pollution. But, it cannot be true because the government
allowed people to use it and it is not severe level that we should stop making
using them. This cast doubt on the reading passage’s that using chemicals plays
an important role in water pollution because it helps algae to grow and reduce the
oxygen level in water.
Next, the professor insist that soil loss is
good. It is natural situation. Also. it will be return in an original level.
So, most professionals thinks it is promising. This counters the reading
passage’s assertion that rate of loss of soil can be rigid problem on the
ground that if soil is exterminated, the Everglades will be barren.
Finally, the professor argues that the construction
in the Everglades will not be problematic. The government allow people to build
farms like sugar farms in the Everglades That’s because they will be good place
for the marsh which can be a inhabitant of animals. This refutes the reading
passage’s suggestion that people’s improvement in the Everglades decrease the
size of agriculture which cause demise of several spices of animals.
점수: 22 리딩에 대한 정보가 많이 부족한 통합형 에세이입니다. 통합형 에세이에서 가장 중요한 부분을 차지하는 것 중에 하나는 한 주제에 대하여서 서로 다른 정보를 가지고 잇는 리딩과 리스닝이 어떻게 비교하고 반박을 하는 것인지를 보는 것 입니다. 지금 이 에세이 같은 경우에 있어서는 각 단락들이 리스닝에 대한 정보는 충분하게 잘 전달해 주는 거 같습니다. 하지만 리스닝과는 다르게 리딩에 대한 정보는 한 문장으로만 서술하였습니다. 한 문장으로 끝내는 것 보다는 리스닝을 좀 더 반박할 수 있는 부분들을 더 서술하는 것이 좋을 거 같습니다. 수고많으셨습니다. |