▶ Your Answer : News is a necessary mean are necessary means (news는 복수 주어 입니다) of delivering essential information. Through news, people are able to know could know how the country or the world is going on. Although it is deniable fact that news is a media that everyone needs, it is not good to believe the whole content given by the news. The reasons for this would be explained with two logical arguments. (따라서 본인의 주장이 무엇인건가요?)
To begin with, News is not always reliable news are not always reliable (대문자는 문장 시작할 때만 서술하시길 바랍니다). The original purpose of news is to deliver the fact to the citizens. However, the problem is that they do not only tell true stories to people. tell true story Sometimes, there are wrong information or even distorted ones. For example, in 2014, when 세월호 sank into the sea, of most the people failed to escape from the ship. Therefore, many of them, over 200 people got trapped inside to pass away. Right after the accident happened, all media companies started to quickly broadcast the news to get a sole attention. For that purpose, some of them did not checked the truth and accidently had the news with wrong information. Due to those people, citizens first knew there were just a few people who died or got injured. However, the fact is that over 200 people died because of the incident. The thing is media companies always compete themselves to become the 1st in media world. As a result, they tend to make mistakes because they do not implement enough checking. This is the reason why the news media cannot be a reliable source. On top of that, news do contain biased information. Some people think that news only contain objective arguments and facts. However, there are actually lots of biased ideas in news. There are various media companies in a country. For example, in Korea, there are KBS, SBS, JTBC etc.. In the united states, there are CNN or BBC news. If I include newspaper companies there are a lot more than these. Though it looks like all of these broadcast same stories and information, they all have different views and characteristics. It all differs to the characteristics of companies and anchors. That’s why it is inevitable to have one’s opinion. Moreover, although it has not been made 100 percent official, it is true that the news media are being censored by the government in Korea. It means that the government can manipulate the media if they are willing to. This is also the reason why news media is biased. News can be the fastest way for us to get many information. However, it is always very important to acknowledge the fact that the news have unreliable and biased information. If people watch and hear many news for long time, they would be able to distinguish which is fake news and real news. Therefore, based on the above substantiations, I believe news media is not a reliable source of unbiased information.
점수: 20 전체적으로 너무 장황한 독립형 에세이입니다. 에세이 자체가 너무 장황하다 보니 에세이를 통하여서 무엇을 전달하려고 하는 것인지 파악하기가 어렵습니다. 따라서 지금 이 에세이에서 필요한 것은 좀 더 간결하고 구체적으로 자신의 주장을 전달하시길 바랍니다. 수고많으셨습니다.
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