▶ Your Answer :
Some
people think that the Internet cannot give a help to the students’ studying.
They may have their reasons for that. However, in my opinion, with the help of
the Internet, students can learn more effectively. This is because students can
take a class online and the they can search a lot of things from the Internet.
To begin with, there are lots of internet-classes online and students
can easily access them. Many internet classes are taught by star instructors who
are very famous in teaching. Then, students who cannot take his or her classes
due to the distances or financial reasons can actually participate in the class
online. This is great opportunity for them because they can save time and money
as well as take the class by only taking the internet class. For example, when I was in high school, I had a
problem in the math. However, I lived in province which doesn’t did not have private
institutes. So, I decided to take a math class online whose teacher was the
most famous instructor in the math. Thanks to him Due to his help (thanks to 는 부정적인 causal relationship이 있을 때 사용됩니다), I got a best score in the
midterm exam. 가장 중요한것은 예시를 사용하 실 때 과거형으로 서술하셨다면 쭉 과거 형으로 서술하시길 바랍니다. 이 문제 빼고는 논리적으로 서술하셨습니다. 특히 돈이 없고 수업을 들을 수 없는 환경에 있는 사람들이 인강을 통해 배움을 얻을 수 있게 된다 라는 부분이 가장 좋은 포인트 인거 같습니다.
On
top of that, there are lots (a lot of 일때는 단수 동사 사용 lots 에서는 단수 동사 사용) of information on the internet which help children
to study. In other words, Internet can provide good educational materials. If
children have a question in some type of problem, then they can just search that
online, and it will give them a lot of materials like definitions and theories to
solve the problem. For example, when I have an assignment to write a research
paper, then (위에 문장 도 그렇고 앞에서 if 나 when이나오면 다음 이어지는 문장에서는 then을 쓰시면 안됩니다) I first turn on the computer to find information about the subject of
the report. Then I can find many things on that such as journals and updated
news. These are valuable sources for my assignment to me.
To
sum up, the internet-classes and the huge information that can obtain from
internet make it very useful for studying. For these reasons, I feel that for parents
to let students study with the Internet will be good for their grades. Fair: 17~23 점수: 23 위에서 참석한 것을 보앗듯이 문법적 오류들이 있습니다. 특히 동사 사용에서 문제가 보입니다. 단수 복수 명사에 따라서 동사가 바뀌는 데 각 바디들 첫 문장에서 부터 그러한 부분이 틀렸습니다. 하지만 전체적으로 논리 있게 풀어나갔습니다. 이것 이외에는 문제가 없는 에세이입니다. 수고하셨습니다.
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