▶ Your Answer :
Television plays a significant role in people’s daily lives. Some people think that television should be used to instruct people rather than to entertain them, while others not believe this way. If I were asked to choose one, I would say that television has to be used to entertain people rather than to instruct them. There is a reason as follows.
Television allows people to release their stress and helps them to refresh themselves. Nowadays, many people live in the competitive competition world and under the higher stressful situation. After doing work, they need to relieve their stress. and Most people nowadays watch television when they feel they need relaxation for their evening time. Therefore, instruction channel is good, but an entertainment channel is far much better than educational program to them for rest because they don't want to serious or think too much about contents. For example, Seoul National University studied about 1000 people’s favorite programs and their preferences. According to the study, 70% of people chose entertainment programs such talk show, and comedy comedian for their favorite show. Some of them said that their lives were very hard, so they did not want to watch programs dealing with serious program like documentary. Also, some of them thought that the time of watching television time was their only time that no one interfere in interpreted their lives. Even, 5% of people laughed only (Too lower rate) when they watched a television comedian show in whole day. On the other hand, only 3% of people liked instructed program such as documentaries, news, and current events and politics shows. However, they watched entertainment programs for 40% of time that they watched television. (Unclear) They had a lot of attention to current events and politics shows, but they said they could not watch it for whole day. (Why's that?) This means that television should be funny things rather than instructed and serious things.
All things considered, I strongly believe that television should be used to entertain people rather than to instruct them for the reason I already discussed.
채점기준표 | Grammar | Contents | Example | Coherence | 점수 | 3 | 2 | 2 | 3 | Score | Fair 16-19 | - 이유는 최소 2가지 이상으로 적어주세요.
- 예시에서 3%라는 비율은 상당히 적은비율로 자신의 주장을 support 하기에는 다소 설득력이 낮아보입니다.
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