▶ Your Answer :
The reality people often encounter shifts
an individual's experience. It is ironic to think that an experience is
affected by past experiences. However, considering how the past experiences
distort, transform, and misrepresent the reality people perceive, it seems
clear that experiences can make differences in people perspective. To prove
one's perspective true, one should be able to justify his or her viewpoint and
overcome objections. Though many people see this topic as Comprehending the
past is not crucial to being able to tackle obstacles facing us now and in the
future, my perspective is comprehending the past is important to being able to
tackle obstacles facing us now and in the future. The concept of perspective
and a job clearly support this topic.
The first of all, comprehending the past
enables to people broaden their perspectives, overcoming obstacles facing us
now and in the future. This is because by comprehending the past people can be
exposed to the different ideas and thoughts that they have never known before
through comprehending the past. Consequently, this can take a quantum leap in
intellectual growth and accept diversity important in an era of globalization.
For example, before going to college my sister studied past examination about
College Admission Test. As a result, she understood a variety of test pattern
which repeated every second years. Eventually, she can get high scores, going to
the best university in Korea. Therefore, comprehending the past is helpful for
people to control obstacles facing us now and in the future.
Second, comprehending the past is helpful
for one's career. This is due to the fact comprehending the past can develop
problem-solving skills. as modern society has increasingly developed, today's
companies are looking for employee having such qualities. There are important
to fight for a job in a highly competitive labor market. For instance, my
father, the CEO of a company in Korea, often tells me that a job interview
typically precedes hiring decision. He and other interviewer at interview
mainly are looking for the applicant' passion and problem-solving. Therefore,
by overcoming obstacles through comprehending the past people can get a good job.
Truth must settle at some point; only one
perspective survives, and the rest subsides into history. In such a case, man
must ceaselessly refine his view until it is finally accepted as truth. I have
corroborated my perspective on this issue comprehending the past is critical to
being able to tackle obstacles facing us now and in the future with perspective
and a job. It is time for a settlement.
Fair: 17~23 점수: 22 일단 이 에세이는 처음 부터 끝까지 너무 장황스럽습니다. 특히 이러한 장황함은 인트로에서 가장 드러나게 보여지는데. 인트로에서는 자신의 의견 도 나오고 이 에세이의 방향성이 무엇인지 알려줘야 하는데 지금 이 에세이 같은 경우에 있어서는 방향성이 많이 부족합니다. 에세이를 통하여서 무슨 말을 전달하려고 하는 것인지 모르겠습니다. 장황하게 에세이를 서술하는 것 보다는 간결하게 자신의 의견을 전달하는 것이 독립형 에세이에서는 더 좋을 거 같습니다. 수고많으셨습니다.
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