Without doubt, way of learning is an important
part in school life. Some people says that it is more important for
students to understand ideas and concepts than it is for them to learn facts,
while others disagree. If I had to choose one, I would say that understanding
idea and concepts are significant than learning facts. There are several
reasons and examples as follows; Tthe Iincreasing ability of solving problems and giving
motivations for them.
First of all, understanding ideas and concepts allows students to enhance their
skill to solve problems. This is due to the fact that understanding the fundamental
idea could broaden their academic perspectives. By applying the idea to other
subjects, students can deal with other issues which is difficult to solve.
Students cannot learn this kinds of skill by learning given facts. For
example, my youngest brother learned the idea and concepts of math in school.
And then he applied it to build a dog house(calculrating
precisely and applying it). Simple textbook that is
filled with facts, could not give that skills to students.
What is more important is that understanding the idea and concepts enables students to have active attitudes toward various
kinds of subjects. It is obvious that teenagers commonly have s lots of curiosities which came from basic
idea and concepts around us. Therefore, learning of these things could be good
motivations for them to keep continuing their study. Every great invention was
created by these this kinds of
motivations, such as the apple of Newton. For instance, one of my friends whose
name is John studied about the universe and understood the concepts of it.
After that he finally found a new star in the universe by using a personal
microscope and named it with his name 'John'. Understanding the concepts did an
important role to make it.
In brief, the advantages of understanding ideas and concepts far outweigh the
advantages of learning facts for the reasons I have mentioned above. All in
all, ideas and concepts are most significant factors for students.
Good (24–26)
서론
-; 뒤에 고유 명사 제외하고 대부분 소문자로 시작합니다. 또한, 뒤에 Increasing 도 대소문자 오류 입니다.
-토픽에 대한 대답과, 본인의 주장 표현 잘 하셨습니다.
첫번째 본문
-밑줄 친 부분, 더 구체적으로 써주세요. 왜 수학적 지식으로 개집을 만드는 것이 더 중요한 일인지 자세히 써주세요.
-철자 오류. calcurating-->calculatng
-수동태도 사실로 가득찬, 이라고 쓰셔야 문맥상 자연스럽습니다. 따라서 is 넣어주세요.
두번째 본문
-수 일치. understanding 을 받으므로 enables 로 써주세요.
-수 일치. teenagers 를 받으므로 have를 써주세요.
-수 일치. kinds가 복수 이므로 these 로 써주세요.
첫번째 본문 개선해주세요. 두번째 본문 내용 괜찮습니다.
문법적인 오류들 개선해주세요.
수고하셨습니다~~