■ Direction Read the question below. You have 30 minutes to plan, write, and revise your essay. Typically, an effective response will contain a minimum of 300 words. ■ Question Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Use specific reason and examples to support your answer |
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▶ Topic : Do you agree of disagree with the following statement? People should be able to take criticism from other members in order to succeed tin a group project. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. |
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▶ Your Answer :
It is debatable whether people should be able to take criticism from other members in order to succeed in a group project. This is an intriguing question because opinions concerning this issue can be different depending on the individual perspective (individual + 단수명사). In my opinion, However, I support that people should be able to take criticism from other members for the following reasons. First of all, people can do a group project more efficiently. To be specific, receiving opinions from other members can produce better ideas that I could not come up with. As a result, people will be able to, more quickly and efficiently, finish the group project. People can do this by taking criticism from other members. To illustrate, Steve Jobs, who is the founder of Apple, made great accomplishments in his lifetime. I read online that he produces very successful cell-phones because whenever he worked in his team project, he can have great ideas. He did this to get advice from other members by having positive and humble attitude. Therefore, this proves that people should be able to take criticism from others in order to succeed in a group project. In addition, taking other comments is more beneficial to group project in terms of cooperation. To be specific, if they freely give and take their opinions, they do not need to fight each other. Thus, they can be more united which as a result will finish a group project better. For example, when I was in high school, I had a group project. My friend and I discussed our topic but he did not receive all my opinions. We had a big fight and did not have any talks until due date. Finally, we reported not a great project and got a low grade in our class. Through this experience, I realized that taking others’ criticism is very important in a group project. Hence, this shows that people should be able to get comments for the successful group project. In conclusion, I firmly believe that people should be able to take criticism from other members in order to succeed in a group project. All things considered, it is my belief that my arguments regarding this topic have been effectively and precisely delivered with the reasons mentioned above. Never should we forget that this issue may have a huge impact on our future. |
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점수: 26/30
1. 문법에서는 단복수, 주어동사 일치를 봐주세요. (대체적으로 깔끔한 편이긴 합니다.)
2. 첫 번째 바디와 두 번째 바디가 다소 비슷한 감이 있습니다.
첫 번째는 efficiency, 두 번째는 cooperation으로 서로 다른 방향을 잡아주고 에세이를 써주세요.
3. 인트로와 conclusion을 잘 쓰셨습니다.
조금만 더 다듬으면 고득점이 가능할 것으로 생각됩니다.
수고하셨습니다. *^^*