▶ Your Answer : Since we enter >> enter 보다는 face 해서 맞딱드리다 라고 해주는게 좋지 않을까 싶습니다 the capitalism society, money is the most important factor among modern people. Some people agree with the comment mentioned above,>> 콤마 빼주세요 due to general perceptions,>> 여긴 콤마 넣어주세요 which are prevailing nowadays. On the other hand, others argue that we should not be perceived by how much money he or she has or what I can do in terms of social power. In this essay, i will illustrate why social position>> social status 가 더 좋습니다 and a lot of money are important and reasons why I support the topic.
To begin with, money allows people to do almost everything, I think. In capitalism, if people want to buy what they need or want, they have to can >> if 절 주어가 현재면 주절 조동사가 현재로 나와줘야 합니다 pay in cash or card. In other words, money is essentially needed, essentially. Without material possessions, we cannot purchase anything in the modern world. According to a survey conducted by some researching groups, among options such as kindness, belief, warm heart and>> 가운데 and 가 왜 들어갔나요? money, house, and so on, 65% of people chose money is the most essential element.>> 문장 전체를 어떻게 해석해야 할 지 난감합니다 This survey shows that people usually much care about the amount of money they have in these days.
In addition to this, people want to go up in a high position >> the ladder. In order to go up>> promote, they tend to do almost everything, which helps them to enhance their social status. This trend existed before. In the 1500s, people took an exam which is known as 'Gwa geo' >> 영어로 소리나는 대로 써주세요. Through this exam, the nation, called 'Cho Seon', guranteed people, who passed the exam, to be in high status and income. From then on, the needs that people get win a lofty status have prevailed among societies.
In conclusion, I think that social position and what I have are comparatively crucial among contemporary people. Although we ought not to miss old-fashioned values like such as honour, kindness, and trust, we had better more would better concentrate on substantial values like>> such as money or social positon.
money or social position 보단 financial or social status 등으로 묶어서 표현하는 것도 좋겠네요 I 는 무조건 대문자로 써주시구요 위에 표시해드린 부분들 봐주시길 바랍니다
Task Achievement - 6 Coherence and Cohesion - 5 Lexical Resource - 6 Grammatical Range and Accuracy - 5 5.5 예상합니다 |