It is generally believed that the Internet is an excellent means of communication but some people suggest that it may not be the best place to find information.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Since the advent of the internet, many experts have acknowledged the value of the internet in modern societies, especially in terms of communication with others. However, some people assert that there are some disadvantages, such as false information. I will discuss on the two aspects of the internet, and state my own opinions.
Firstly, when it comes to an advantage for the internet, a prominent feature is that it is foremost as the method of interacting with people . This is because it enhances the connections between respective individual in a convenient way, using SNS or MSN. To be specific, thanks to the internet, people can keep in touch with others who live far from without any extra-charges. As a result, people can maintain their bond with their loved ones as well as overcome some barriers of long distances. Thus, it is fairly said that nothing is more a marvellous means than using the internet so far.
On the other hand, there is a shortcoming in using of the internet. In the case of researching expertise, it is a well-known fact that it is hard to trust all of the information on the internet as it is not always officially certified does not identified officially, and even includes biased contents. For example, according to rules of dissertation, students should not cite information from websites the internet such as Wikipedia in on their office documents. <(왜 그런지도 전달해주시면 더 좋을 것 같습니다.) Not only that, distinguishing what is a reliable information is really tricky if a person is not aware of that subject. Therefore, it should not be believed that the internet is the best way to research information knowledge.
In conclusion, even if it is clear that the internet is remarkably a beneficial gadget, but I strongly believe that people should not entirely trust on the internet, and but be careful by double checking the information it out when using it.
Score: 7
Comment: 잘 서술 해주셨습니다. 문법상 표현/collocation 에 조금 더 신경을 써주시면 좋을 것 같습니다. 수고 하셨습니다.