▶ Your Answer :
Nowadays, the modern technology has been distributing disturbed a rapid dissemiination dissemination of using cellular phones throughout all over the world. Hence, it is common to see people using their phone for calling, messaging texting and even searching information on the applications at all times and places. This trend seems to help to improve and flourish standards of living improved and flourish. That can be partly true and persuasive. However, from my perspective of this trend, the mobile phone has its downsides as well. It affects negative our way of life, partilculary for the young's of.
First of all, mobile phone deteriorates children's concentration. According to a recent news, the phone distracting young people thing in school is that students keep their phone during the classes. That is distracting disturbs not only students themselves but also the flow of lectures. Furthermore, there was a research about the decrease of handwriting ability among the young because of not to use a note and a pencil to write down. Thereby, a few schools have started not to allow students to bring their mobile devices to the classes. In spite of schools' efforts to eradicate any distractions from students, it still remains one of the biggest parts of the problems.
Additionally, smart phone worsens a lack of communication between the young and their parents at home. Teenagers prefer to communicate with one another via mobile devices. The more young people spend their time with on the mobile phone, the less they get an ability to communicate with their parents efficiently face to face. There was a great photograph to depict our modern family. In the picture there were 4 members of a family holding or looking at their personal devices not talking with each other in a living room, despite they were sitting side by side. We cannot>> cannot은 붙여쓰셔야 합니다 doubt that this scene is hardly seen around us. disapearing conversations among family members also influences on a deep connection or a bonds between generations.
In conclusion, even though there are a lot of advantages of modern technology, we should be aware of its disadvantages not to destroy the young's focus on their study and find a good way of using cellular phones in order to promote generations' connection or understanding.
Task Achievement - 6
Coherence and Cohesion - 7
Lexical Resource - 7
Grammatical Range and Accuracy - 6
6.5 예상합니다 |