Nowadays we are producing more and more rubbish. Why do you think this is happening? What can governments do to help reduce the amount of rubbish produced?
These days, amount of rubbish abandoned by humans is increasing dramatically in consumerism society. There are some reasons why this phenomenon occurs and also some solutions to alleviate the issue.
To begin
with, people’s needs drive to all kinds of negative present circumstances associated
with trash. First and foremost, people utilize goods made by non-recyclable
materials, especially plastic products. More and more consumers want to use
plastic goods in their life. It is commonly seen the The usage of plastic is commonly seen in restaurants,
cafes, cinemas even at home in various forms like plastic bags, plastic straw, container
and so on. This is mainly because that it was made up lightweight and strong, compared to matter
unlikely paper or glass so that it is easy, inexpensive and undamaged for a long
period of time. In addition, a good number of producers tend to overpack or overlap their goods do
overpackaging and overlapping. In wrapping process, they try to make the product look like bigger
and more expensive because in order to meet buyers’ demand in modern consumer/consumption consume
society.
Nevertheless,
there are some solutions to improve the current problem, with actions by the governments. (기존 표현은 '정부가 일으키고 있는 문제' 의 의미가 됩니다.) First of
all, governments should open purchasers' eyes through guidelines, and make them be aware of the fact that their consumption habits destroy the environment (참고로, consume 은 동사입니다.) encourage to open purchasers eyes that destruct the
environment because of their consume habit through some guidelines. For
example, governments able to make some public campaign advertisements that encourage
using or consuming recyclable stuff (구어에 가까운 표현이므로 웬만하면 대체해주세요~) in order to decrease non-biodegradable
trash. Secondly, governments have to/can had to restrict and examine manufacturing factories’
producing and packaging process. If few factories break the law, they can/may impose some
penalties like a fine and suspension suspend.
In conclusion,
people lead to environmental problem (단순 환경 문제가 아닌 '쓰레기' 로 구체화해주세요! 이런 거는 패러프레이징의 대상이 아닙니다.) because of their aspirations so that governments
must take action through consumers and producers’ improving the awareness about
nature regarding consumers and producers.
총평: (6/6/7/6) 6.5
나름의 다양성에 주목해서 문법에서 6점을 넣긴 했으나, 명사형이 와야 하는 경우에 동사형이 오는 등 전반적인 오류 자체는 조금 있는 편이라 채점관에 따라 5점으로 내려갈 확률도 어느정도 존재합니다. 고로 이 부분에 유의해주시고, 결론에서와 같이 내용이 논제와 비교해서 조금이라도 새지 않도록 신경써주세요~수고하셨습니다 :)
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