이게 topic이고 저는 이렇게 적었습니다.
The given line graph describes data regarding how much grams Spanish people ate up six kinds of meat per week from 2001 to 2011.
Looking from an overall perspective, it is obvious that an upward trend was seen in the consumption of Chicken (고기 종류는 싹 소문자 시작해주시면 됩니다.) and Pork between 2001 and 2011, while the amount of other types of meat consumed remained relatively constant or went down during the same time.
Looking at the graph more closely, one can see that consumers in Spain spent money (의외로 많은 수험생들이 틀리는데, 물론 consume 이 소비라는 의미도 있긴 하지만 여기에서의 consume 은 섭취로만 한정지으시면 됩니다.) on purchasing 450g of Chicken per week in the beginning, but there was a dramatic rise in the consumption of Chicken, being approximately doubled over a decade. Similarly, although that of Pork remained flat over initial 2 years, it increased 200 grams points (혹시 퍼센트포인트에서 따오신 거면, 이런 거는 따로 없으니까 나중에 시간 나시면 퍼센트포인트를 따로 정리해주세요~그건 비율수치의 변화를 설명할 때에만 쓰입니다. 다른데에도 마찬가지이고요.), reaching at the 500 grams until 2011. Meanwhile, the quantity of Beef eaten up by Spanish steeply declined at just under 400 grams points in spite of recovering at around 500 grams in the latter period. Identically, Duck consumption per week decreased and then remained stable at roughly 300 grams by the end of the period. In contrast, Veal and Goat being eaten up were on the lower end throughout the whole period.
총평: (7/7/6/7) 7.0
잘 써주셨는데 위에 표시해드린 대소문자의 구분, 그리고 단어 사용에만 조금 주의해주세요! 또한 grams 를 뺄 경우 그냥 그램 그대로 가주시면 됩니다. 수고하셨습니다 :)
(on time, 199 words)
항상 감사합니다. 비밀번호는 1234입니다.