With the dawn of globalization and the expansion of interaction among nations countries are beginning to lose their national identities and inherent cultures and traditions. Cite some effects of this international trend and list some plausible solutions to prevent this loss.
Today, the world seems to be smaller than before as interactions among the countries have increased. Therefore, I believe that globalization tend to have negative influence on native cultures and languages. In this essay, I will identify the minor impact of globalization on local cultures, and suggest suitable solutions.
To begin with, due to globalization, native diets have been changed. Western culture has lead to not only disappearance of traditional culture but also the neglect of local foods. Especially, children are easily influenced by fast food. This phenomenon results on children to be obesities, losing health diets and disappearance their instinct inherent food cultures. Thus, the government should promote their traditional foods, such as, running a campaign to eat the nation their health and palatable local foods.
Secondly, the government must preserve their own language. In modern society, English plays an important role in modern industries. (끝) that different countries have a conversation as in English. Moreover, English is essential to get more knowledge and information on the Internet. For those these reasons, local people tend to overlook their own languages. In turns As a result, many people make grammatical and spelling errors in their own language. Thus, schools have to reinforce curriculums to learn more their own language.
Lastly, tourism industry brings a negative effect on to not only local culture but also nation`s heritages. Nowadays, advanced transportations offer convenient and fast travelling, therefore, tourists gradually have increased. Consequently, some tourist attractions have experienced of erosion and corruption. In addition, some heritages and local cultures are influenced by tourists. Hence, the government has to restrict some places to enter just enough number of people can.
In conclusion, globalization enhances a part of our life. However, we do not have to neglect our heritages and instinct traditional cultures which is are the history of our own country.
instinct 는 명사로 본능이네요. culture와 연결해서 쓸 수 없겠죠.
전체적으로 구성에도 문제가 있네요.
첫번째 본문은 " 우선 ~ 한 문제가 있다 " 두번째로 " 정부는 그들의 언어를 보호해야 한다"
" 마지막으로 관광산업은 부정적인 영향을 가져온다"
1. 문제/해결 2. 문제/해결 3. 문제 / 해결 방안 과 같은 구조가 좋습니다.
막 섞여 있네요.
첨삭 항상 감사합니다..
기타 질문 있으시면 남겨주세요.