▶ Your Answer :
In modern society, destroying nature is a problematic issue. The environment is changing rapidly. This is because people only care about their economical goals and convenience in commercialized society. This essay will provide the causes of environmental change and present some solutions such as implementation of campaigns and instructions. To begin with, because of the fierce competitive society, many companies only focus on their successes prioritizing making money. <Need better coherence. 다음 예시는 가구 나 종이를 만들거나 minerals가 필요한 회사만 해당이 되는 것 같습니다. 오히려 many companies라고 해주시기 보다는 일단 적으로 사람들이 편의와 욕심 그리고 낭비 때문에 다음 일들을 그에 해당을 회사들이 돈을 위해 하게끔 한다 라고 해주시면 더 좋을 것 같다고 생각합니다.> Therefore they rarely care about the environmental problems, deforesting to manufacture furniture or papers and destroying the mountains to gain minerals without any hesitation. There is no doubt that animals are suffering from the phenomenon as well as humans are, losing their habitats. Moreover, people unconsciously drive their own cars only for their convenience, but, it causes air pollution. To solve these problems, it is clear that changing people's awareness is vital. First of all, the government should encourage people to use public transportation instead of their own cars through implementation of campaigns. Moreover, using resources from nature is unavoidable, so companies should plant trees to preserve the mountain for the environment and their business. Thus, so, the government should encourage these behavior through making a law.
Overall, many companies only care about their own business and people pollute the environment. People these days pollute the environment both deliberately and unintentionally. However, through implementation of campaigns and laws and individual efforts, people can find the solution for the environment as well as the economy.
Score: 7.5 Comment: 잘 서술 해주셨습니다. 수고 하셨습니다. |