Nowadays, people have little awareness of the importance of the natural world. What are the reasons and how can people learn more about the natural world?
(332 words, 42min., 단어 paraphrase하지 않고 그냥 쉬운 단어로 계속 반복해서 써서 그런지 글자수도 많은데 희한하게 빨리 썼네요..
이것까지 review 받을 수 있을지 모르겠습니다. review는 못받더라도 수요일 시험 전날 까지 하루 2편씩은 혼자서 계속 작성하려고 합니다. 성적이 잘 나오던 안나오던 이번 시험이 마지막인데 그동안 도움 주셔서 진심으로 감사드립니다. __ )
In contemporary society,
it seems that people think the environmental protection is none of their
business. In addition, it is hard to find such an initiative in that telling the
importance of the eco-system and the methodologies of protecting it. In the
following essay, the reasons why of the aforementioned phenomenon have happened and
the counter measures will be elaborated.
It seems that people are
indifferent on preserving the Earth since they believe it is the responsibility
of the governments and business establishments. They attest that the pollution
and danger the current world confronts solely came from contributed to the activities of
companies and ridiculous political decisions. Thus they articulate that this
matter should be addressed by the entities which made current situation. In
addition, the people think that the environment cannot be improved because
their individual efforts are so trivial to affect nature. Even more, people frustrate sometimes when they see
irresponsible behavior of others.
Among many approaches that
can be taken into consideration, I believe two 2 entities can have a primary role for
managing the aforementioned problem. First, schools should teach their students
about the importance of conservation and the consequences of wrongdoing of the
people. In addition, the schools can pose eco-related home works that should be
conducted with their parents and neighbors. By doing this, not only the
students but also many members of the community will be aware of the
environment protection. Second, local municipalities should encourage their
residents' interest by conducting public campaigns in order to cultivate
eco-friendly habits in the people's daily life.
Furthermore, the government should regulate the environmentally harmful
business activities and impose duties of environmental protection to the
companies by legislating and strengthening the laws.
In conclusion, most
people tend to think the protecting environment has too big of a huge scale to manage
themselves while their individual effort can be a significant contribution.
Thus the government and educational institutes should enlighten the members of
the society and the politicians have to thoroughly control and audit the
actions of companies.
총평: (7/7/7/7) 7.0
잘 써주셨습니다. 오늘 시험이시네요! 이미 치르고 오셨는지 모르겠지만....지금 글처럼 자잘한 오류를 최소화하면서 쓰셨다면 7.0은 가볍게 받으실 겁니다. 자잘한 오류가 많았다고 하더라도 6.5는 괜찮았을 거고요. 고생하셨습니다. 좋은 소식 기다리고 있을게요~
수고하셨습니다 :)