Nowadays people can easily enjoy themselveswatching (여기 포함, 글 내내 띄어쓰기 문제가 있긴 한데, 옮겨넣는 과정에서 생긴 시스템상의 문제라고 가정하고 따로 점수에 반영하지는 않겠습니다. 대신 실전에서 이러면 그냥 골로 간다고 보시면 돼요.)other people’s life from diverse background at their room due to fast growingInternet technology such as YouTube and Instagram. However, it cannot be the samecontents from the experience travelling to other countries in person.
Watching other countries culture or how otherpeople live through Internet can be different from their real life because of Internettraits. If someone uploads a video Internet, it would be likely to be included with one’sview and the specific interpretation of the situation. It means that people whowatch the video will have a risk to absorb only someone’s view without any perception.Eventually, people might feel very different when they experience the countryin real life. Take the example of myself. Before I went to the UK, I had watchedlots of videos on YouTube about living in the UK and the culture. Lots of videoswhich I had watched included the terrible weather and racism. However, when Ilived in the UK, I was not worried about racism as much as I had been whilewatching the video and realized that I always focused on only bad cases whichsomeone made of.
Also, it is doubtful that how much people experienceother countries by Internet. There are loads of (어느정도 구어에 해당하므로, 따로 쓰지 않는다고 생각하시면 됩니다.) tools which people from othercountries easily communicate each other. Nevertheless, I am an opinion of thatit is very limited. It must be different between when I dance with them in personand when I watch a video which people dance together. (두 본론은 어느정도 비슷하게 맞춰주셔야 합니다. 지금처럼 엄청난 격차가 나지 않도록 주의해주세요!)
In short, it is undeniable that the Internetmakes people feel foreign countries much easier than before but it cannot bethe same experiences from what people literally enjoy other culture in person.
항상 첨삭 감사드립니다! 제가 현재 영어문법책이 하나도 없는데, 혹시 어떤 문법책으로 공부하면 좋을 지 책 추천해 주실 수 있으실까요?
저야 당연히 저희 책을 추천해드리고 싶지만, 사실 어떤 책으로 하든 크게 상관은 없습니다. 꾸준히 한다는 사실이 더 중요해요.
총평: (6/7/6/6) 6.5
(띄어쓰기 문제가 없다는 전제 하에)이번 글 이전보다 나아졌습니다. 아직 7점과는 거리가 있긴 하지만, 그래도 표현상으로 조금 나아졌다는 점이 위안이에요. 물론 여기서 더 나아져야 합니다!
수고하셨습니다 :)