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These days, many experts have debatable opinions about a university’s role of what do they teach for students. Some insist that a university provides practical skills and knowledge for using in their future workplace, but others argue that a university should lead students to access to the knowledge for its own sake not regarding whether the course is useful to an employer. <(thesis statement가 보이지 않습니다)
First of all, I strongly believe that a university is the organization to improve students’ literature knowledge and pure curiosity, and it means this organization is not a commercial institute. This is because that the relationship between professors and students are exist only for study of their subject. Professors lead students to develop their sight and thought think by teaching a professional researches and literacy. If a university provides the knowledge and skills needed in the workplace, it will change a university’s radical purpose that making students be more mature and improving their pure curiosity about studying. Therefore, it is apparent that a university would lead students by teaching their own learning.
Moreover, work skills needed in the workplace can be taught learn enough when students they begin their job. The work skills are fundamentally different. Even if students learn skills from a university, these will not be the same as what they will actually use in their job. According to a recent research from South Korea, people who got the skills from a university about how to act in their workplace, could not cannot adjust with in their colleagues and work environment. They are surveyed the knowledge learned from a university is essentially different with the workplace’s. It is evident that skills and knowledge from the workplace cannot be gained get from a university.
To conclude, I definitely perceive that a university is the organization to teach study how to learning, not to teach commercial skills. The true function of a university is to arouse pure desire about study.
Score: 6.5 Comment: 질문에 대한 답이 좋고 내용도 좋고 잘 서술해주셨지만 어색한 문장구조가 일부 있습니다. 그 부분들은 글 안에 있는 수정을 봐주시면 될 것 같습니다. 또한 글쓴이의 주장을 Body에서 부터가 아니라 Introduction에서 부터 clear해야합니다. 그 외에는 내용을 조금 더 summarize해주시고 정리를 해주시면 좋을 것 같습니다. 수고 하셨습니다. |