▶ Your Answer : The lecture asserts that the number of bees hadn't increased because of human activities while the reading passage casts doubt dobt on it. 본론에 요약하신 내용을 봤을 때는 벌의 개체수가 늘어난 이유가 아니라 줄어든 이유에 대한 의견 대립으로 보이는데, 지문 다시 확인해주세요.
Firstly, the lecturer claims that the number of commercial bee hives hivies had increased even the pesticide named "neonicotinoid" was(had been) used in nearby areas a lot. The speaker explains that not all bees die due to this specific pesticide. This rebuts the point made by the reading passage that pesticide can be the reason of reduction in bee population since bees pollinate flower's pollen which can be affected by the neonicotinoid. 특정 pesticide의 사용이 문제가 되는 문단이니 reading도 그 내용을 중점적으로 더 간단하게 요약할 수 있을 것 같아요.
Secondly, the professor argues that the research reseach which shows decrease in bee population is not objective since the experts participated in the research which was not professional. She additionally says that, the researchers picked anyone they wanted to use as an information gatherer. This rebuffs the reading's assertion assertment that due to the change of the farming method, much many of the Earth's environment has changed and it led to an elimination of areas that bees can build their hives. lecture와 reading의 연관성이 잘 드러나지 않습니다. 대립되는 main point를 분명히 해주세요.
Finally, the speaker contends contents that the reduction of bees may not result in mass starvation worldwide. This is due to the fact that the type of bee which reduced its number is mostly the bees which do not pollinate the crops that humans consume. This casts doubt on the point made by the reading passage that the population of bees which pollinate crops are reducing declining while the global food demand is increasing. 이 부분도 두 지문의 연관성을 알기 어려운 것 같아요. 어떤 내용을 중심으로 대립하는지 분명히 해주세요.
Comment : 전반적으로 두 지문이 어떤 주제를 공통으로 다루는지, 어떤 요소를 중심으로 대립하는지가 불분명합니다. 핵심 내용을 명확히 파악해서 각 본론별로 중점을 두어야 하는 point를 잡아두고 정리하시면 좋을 것 같아요. 오탈자가 많은 편이니 정확한 표현도 신경써주세요~ 수고 많으셨습니다~!
Integrated Writing Rubrics Score 3/5 A response at this level contains some important information from the lecture and conveys some relevant connection to the reading, but it is marked by one or more of the following : - Although the overall response is definitely oriented to the task, it conveys only vague, global, unclear, or somewhat imprecise connection of the points made in the lecture to points made in the reading. - The response may omit one major key point made in the lecture. - Some key points made in the lecture or the reading, or connections between the two, may be incomplete, inaccurate, or imprecise. - Errors of usage and/or grammar may be more frequent or may result in noticeably vague expressions or obscured meanings in conveying ideas and connections. |