▶ Your Answer : A vVariety of options may exist over
the statement that people should read various news sources in order to maintain their knowledge updated.
My standpoint on this topic is that we should use a variety of sources of news.
Firstly, the different sources of news provide
a broad range of knowledge. Secondly, informing from various
news sources is a reliable way to get
information.
To start with, various news sources
provide knowledge in a wide range of
subjects. By experiencing the various topics, we can obtain unbiased knowledge. Otherwise, we could be an lopsidedly informed person. For example,
there was an old professor last semester,
and he hads a lot of knowledge on his subject,
Heat transfer, but he did not know a subject of Molecular
Dynamics. Therefore, to be well informed, we should
get information from variety of sources.
On top of that, some of news sources would provide
wrong information. Hence, we should get information from various sources. Human has limited knowledge, and their knowledge is imperfect.
Hence, historically, human do mistake.
For example, the well-known scientist
Fourier overlooks on his equation because
of lack of information about convection.,
To prevent that kind of situation, getting from various
sources of news is crucial.
Top sum up, I think getting information from various sources is important because of
following two reasons. First, multiple
sources provide a broad range of knowledge. Second, obtaining information from many sources is reliable.
Fair (17-23)
서론 -a variety of 혹은 various 로 표현해주세요.
첫번째 본문,두번째 본문 -예시 내용을 더 보충해주세요. 마지막 문장은 글에서 갑자기 점프하여 결론을 낸 느낌입니다. 설명을 더 자세하게 쓰는 연습해주세요. -전체적으로 주장과 이유만 있고 이유에 대한 뒷받침 설명이 부실합니다. 뒷받침 설명이 내용이 충분하고 잘하셔야 글의 설득력이 올라갑니다.
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