▶ Your Answer :
People attend university or college for various reasons. Some people may just want to increase the chance to get a job or others may want to meet new people. However, in my opinion, the main reason to attend university or college is to prepare one`s career. There are two reasons to support my idea.
First of all, higher education help people to prepare their future career by providing outstanding internship programs. For instance, when i was in a high school, i joined an internship in radio astronomy but not a famous institution. However, i had not conducted any research because they had no any instruments. However, when i was in university, i joined another internship in the same field but much well known institution. In that time, i could process data obtained from telescope and show up some scientific results. Therefore, colleges or universities can provide good quality of internships so that people attend higher education.
Second, doing Bachelor in universities or colleges is essential for the future career. To be specific, if one has no any undergraduate degree, he or she may have no much choices in their future career due to their limited experiences and abilities. Many researchers are looking for Master or Doctoral candidates who already graduated colleges or universities. Without having undergraduate degree, there are no any chances to get post graduate degree. Moreover, in the 21 century, academic background has became an important factor for future career in, for instance, robotics, machine learning and others. Thus, attending college or universities is not a selection but essential for future career.
All things considered, i think that people join the universities or colleges for their career. This is because of the reasons that i have mentioned above; providing good internship programs and attending universities or colleges is essential for future. Thus, joining universities and colleges are imperative for career.
에세이 잘 쓰셨습니다. 전체적으로 아주 논리있고, supporting detail들도 자세하게 잘 작성해주어, 문장간의 연결이나, 이해가 아주 좋습니다. 물론 어휘 조금만 더 다양하게 쓸 수 있다면 너무 좋을 것 같습니다. (약간씩 반복되어보입니다) 문장이나 문법적인 오류는 거의 없는 편입니다. 에세이 연습 조금만 더 열심히 하시면, 문장쓰기 더 쉬워질 것 같습니다. |