■ Direction You have 20 minutes to plan and write your response. Your response will be judged on the basis of The quality of writing and on how well your response presents the points in the lecture and the relationship to the reading passage. Typically, an effective response will be 150 to 225 words. ■ Question Summarize the points made in the lecture you just heard, explaining how they cast doubt on the points made in the reading
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▶ Topic :
| Moving to a new city or country is not a good idea because you will lose your old friends.
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▶ Your Answer :
It is debatable whether moving to a new place is the right decision considering a relationship with my old friends. This is an intriguing question because opinions concerning this can be different relying on individual perspectives. In my opinion, however, I disagree with the statement for the following subsequent two reasons. To begin with, we would not lose our old friends even if we move to a new place. In the past, we had no choice but to give up the relationship because of a lack of contact methods. However, these days, we can communicate with them by using advanced technology such as an Email or Facebook. Furthermore, we can make an appointment when a special day is coming like Christmas day, and we have a great time together in person. For example, last semester, I studied abroad in China. since my original university was located in Korea, I could not meet my friends for a while. However, I talked with them through Facebook messages and I could see their daily lives by Instagram. When I constantly contact them by using my phone, I could feel that I was still maintaining a deep relationship with them. On top of that, it might be beneficial for us to move to a new city in terms of more opportunities. As our society becomes global, living in the hometown for one's entire life would be harmful. (이에 대한 이유 설명을 보충해주세요) In other words, moving to another city can give us a better job, a nice house, a favorable climate, and advanced facilities. For instance, I had lived in Seoul for a decade, and when I was eleven years old, my family moved to a new city, Jeonju. After I moved, I felt lonely a bit, but I could enjoy the fresh air and I got a more spacious house. Not only that, I got in touch with my old friends who attended the same elementary school as me, I could adapt well to the new environment without any problem. In a nutshell, moving to another place would not make us lose our old friends. Moreover, there might be a better chance to improve my standard of living in other places. In this regard, I disagree with the statement that moving (대소문자 구분) to a new place is not desirable because of losing old friends. |
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1. 큰 문법 오류도 없고, 내용도 잘 쓰셨습니다.
2. 토픽에서 이미 losing old friends가 나왔으니
이 에세이는 옮겨야 좋은 이유 보다는
lose old friend 하지 않을 것이다 라는 흐름으로 가야합니다
따라서 두 번째 바디에서는 the advantages of having new opportunities are bigger than the disadvantages of losing old friends
이런 식으로 가면 더 좋을 거 같습니다!
수고하셨습니다. *^^*