I believe meaningful relationship can only be established on the ground of truth. Truth, by itself, has a magical power that bounds people together helping them to build up good relationship. Also, most of times, when people find out the truth that was covered by others, the relationship will be weakend a lot.
I would like to share my persnonal experience of revealing one of my most hurting history with my friend. When I was young, my family was one of the poorest family in my class. I was so shameful of the fact, so I pretended to be one of wealthy child. At that time, I was wearing mask that barriers me from others. Then one day, I just could not bear all of lies I make. So, I shared my big secret with one of my best friend, cring and feeling sorry for deceving him for a long time. Surprisingly, he was not upset at all, rather he cried with me. It happend about 15 years ago, but I still contact with him, and depend on him because our relationship is based on the truth.
When I treated people with candor, I gained trust from others unwittingly, but when I lied, including unintentional or white lies, I realized that I am getting far from people I lied. When I was in high school, I fonded of a pretty girl named Christin. Even though I did not explicitely told her how I think about her, I guess she knew that I liked her. One day, she asked me to go out for movie when I actually had another appointment for soccer game. As I knew that she does not like soccer, I said I had an appointment with parents at that day. As things happen, somehow she found out that I lied to her, so her attitude towards me changed dramatically, and I never had a chance to get close to her again. From my own unfortunate and sad love story, I realized that any type of lie can bring unexpected side effects.
Sometimes, people lie to avoid seemingly bad situation ahead of them. However, as my experiences reflect, any type of relationship lack of truth is like a edifice built on the desert. It might be alight for a short moment, but in the long run, it is truth that speaks for truth receeds another truth whereas lie receeds suspects. |