안녕하세요 우선 제 에세이는 아닙니다. 근데 에세이 공부할려고
TESTMAGIC이란곳에서 에세이 샘플을 받아서 공부하는데 거기 스텝분들이 만든 샘플이라하지만
제가 보기엔 너무 도저히 샘플이라고 할수 없을 정도여서 한번 여러분들의 평가를 바랍니다.
제가 처음 공부하는거라서 좋은 에세이를 별로라 잘못생각할수 있는것이니.
과연 토플에서 이정도 에세이가 괜찮은 에세이인지 아니면 정말 시덥잖은 에세이인지
의견 부탁드립니다.
감사합니다.
Essay Topic: |
Are parents good teachers of their children?
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Obviously, the first teachers we have in our lives in most cases are our parents. They teach us to walk, to speak, and to have good manners before we reach "the real world." More than even the professional teachers that we have in school, parents are generally the most involved in the development and education of children.
Almost for sure our parents are the best teachers at the beginning of our lives, which actually corresponds to the parents' role in nature. Parents are most committed and involved in teaching their children; they have a kind of instinct to sacrifice a part of themselves for the betterment of their children. They love us and have great patience while passing down their knowledge to us. They wish us a success and thus will not teach us bad things. And of course, implicit learning occurs when children unconsciously copy some of their parents' habits and styles of behavior.
During the second stage of child development, adolescence, parents can still be in the best position to offer advice even though the children might not accept it. In this case, perhaps the child's friends would be the best teachers. Adolescents are notoriously rebellious in many cultures and may automatically reject any advice from their parents. My first marriage for instance, was solely a matter of doing the opposite when my parents tried to intrude in offering their advice. So in such matters, parents should be much more flexible and be rather the partners with their children. So we can see that being a teacher of growing child become more and more complicated case as the time passes and many parents are simply not able to meet the increased demands.
On the other hand, I would say that parents are not professional teachers and they tend to be very biased by their love of their children. So wishing good things and an easy life may prevent children from maturation. In any case, parents usually can present only one viewpoint of the world, while good teaching should be based on different attitudes. Thus, when children go to school and have a great diversity of teachers, they learn much more than their parents could probably give them. Furthermore, once our parents get older, they become more conservative and cannot always be objective in regard to modern trends and fashions. Thus we need to take their advice with caution during that period. However, some kind of intuition which I believe shared between relatives about what everybody needs and great love which exists in a families still makes our parents very good teachers and advisers at any time.
In conclusion, while parents are not the ideal teachers, and well-rounded children will generally need a great diversity of teachers in their lives in order to have a more accurate view of the world, parents are generally the most committed of all teachers and have the greatest emotional investment in their children and their future.