▶ Your Answer : Nowadays,
we are living in an era where technological advances are common, which our grandparents would not have imagined. even have not imagined.
We have machines that make our lives easier. Therefore, it is so granted that
our life is much more comfortable and easier than generation of the old.
To
begin with, the technology has improved. For example, there are laundry
machines, dryers, refrigerators, and so on. These help us to make our chores
much easier. When I was young, I saw my grandmother doing the laundry by her
hands even in winter. However, these days, we use a laundry machine, which can
be used indoors and does not have any limitation of the season. We just put our
clothes in it, waiting until it ends with ringing the bell. 이런 디테일은 사실 필요가 없습니다. put clothes and wait. 이런 식으로만 쓰고 끝내도 됩니다. It does not hurt
our hands and our hands do not need to touch water. Additionally, with dryers,
we just put laundries, too. We do not have to wait for a day to get them dried.
Not only is it time-consuming, but also convenient for us.
On
top of that, the improvement of communication technology made our lives easier,
such as smartphones and computers. For a long time ago, it was hard for
grandparents to talk to their friends who live far away. When they wanted to
meet them, they must walk for a long time to make an arrangement. Fortunately,
we have smartphones. We only have to send messages or e-mail to them to have a meeting, which is very comfortable. 그냥 only send messages 라고만 하면 전달하고자 하는 뉘앙스 전달이 안 됩니다. Furthermore, when grandparents searched something, they used their
dictionaries. Today, we do not have that thick books. We can just search the
Internet what we want to know. It is beneficial to us because the speed of
finding is faster and we can get information as soon as possible.
In
conclusion, the innovation of technology got our lives so convenient. Our
chores became far easier. In addition, we can communicate easily. For this
regard, I strongly agree that our lives are better than those of our
grandparents.
채점기준표
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Grammar
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Contents
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Example
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Coherence
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점수
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2
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2
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2
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2
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Score
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limited |
- 우선 문법 오류가 굉장히 많습니다 - 특히 시제 같은 경우는 p.p 더 자세하게 공부할 필요가 있어보입니다. - 그리고 문장 형식 자체가 어색해서 전하고자 하는 바가 명확히 전달되지 않은 부분이 조금 있는데 짧은 문장이라도 영작 연습 많이 하는 습관 들여야 할 것 같습니다
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