▶ Your Answer :
In the modern society, society puts a big emphasis
on speaking one’s opinion in front of the mass
and also self esteem. Compared to the past times, having the wit to speak one’s opinion and lead a group has have
become more important quality of a person since there are more chances to make
speeches.
and Furthermore, individuals have much
more rights. Regarding this trend, it is needless to say that being a leader is
better than being a follower on the grounds that being a leader has
credits and power. <문장이 너무 긴 것 같습니다. 중간에 접속사를 넣어서 끊어주세요 ^^>
To
begin with, a leader is better than a follower because the leader gets the most
credit. In other words, leader is the one who gets the most spotlights for the
works that a group has done. To be specific, in
many parts of the society, at school, at workplace, people work in groups. They
are given certain tasks to be evaluated on. In evaluation process, if the
results are good, the leader gets most credits because people praise his or her
leadership, how he or she has contributed to organize and distribute work of
all other group members. For instance, job interviews or university entrance
interviews, people put a great emphasis on the experience of being a leader.
Interviewers or the assessors give bonus points to volunteers who have shown
leadership. <잘 쓰신 것 같아요 ^^ 예를 넣어주시면 더 좋을 것 같아요~>
In
addition, being a leader is preferable than being one those who follows follow
the leader because of the leader gets the most power. Just like what the literal
follower means literally, the followers have to
follow the instructions of the leader. Also, even though a follower has a
brilliant idea, his or her idea may be neglected if the leader does not like
it. On the other hand, being a leader brings a lot of burden but at the same
time, a great power. The leader has the right to assign his or her followers
with works and the leader he or she is
the one who makes or approves of decisions. 라는 단어가 너무
많이 나오네요. 유의어 또는 대명사를 사용해주세요~>
From my experience, I was selected as the class representative last year. I was
the student leader of my class and although it was sometimes stressful, having
the power to make decisions for in class parties or choosing classroom uniform
was great.
To
conclude, to choose between being the one who leaders leads others and being the one who is led by the
other, the former is better. This is because the leader gets more credits from
the others or the assessors than any other group members and also it brings
power to decide and make opinions.
잘 쓰신
것 같네요~ 문법상 괜찮고, 이유도 적절한 것 같습니다! 수고하세요~ |