▶ Your Answer :
Nowadays, more and more people are trying to attend college or university. For Typical reasons are accumulating new experiences, preparing for career preparation(,) and building up increased knowledge. When it comes to the statement that why people attend college or university, I believe that increased knowledge and career preparation are is main reasons.
First of all, nowadays, people should update their knowledge to adjust to society well. This is because technologies have been developing in a facst pace (이런 식으로 이유와 그것을 뒷받침해주는 문장을 함께 써주시면 좋습니다) technology is developing so fast that people could not keep up with them unless they keep increasing their knowledge. There is a great example supporting this idea. My friend entered mobile phone company after graduated high school. However, He could not do cannot did work well(.) since he could not keep up with changing new technology. For this reason he decided to enter university to take higher level of education attend university to expand his ken. Thus, I think that people attend university to acquire more knowledge.
In addition to that Not only that, I believe that people enroll college or university for their career preparation. Most companies prefer applicants who are well educated and jobs want people who more educated and have good skills. People attending university could get a lot of knowledge and advanced skills needed for their future job. (이 문장은 단순히 앞에서 했던 이야기를 또 하는 듯 합니다. 처음 두 문장에서 서술한 바를 expound 해주세요~) In addition, usually people, who graduated college or university, are respected more in community. Therefore, people entering college or university could get more job opportunities.
In conclusion, I think that having deeper increased knowledge and preparing for career preparation are two is main reasons that people attend college or university.
글이 전반적으로 simple 하고 내용도 길지 않습니다. 내용을 보충하실 수 있도록 구체적인 예시나 객관적인 자료를 제시해주시면 좋을 것 같습니다. 다양한 단어를 쓰시는 연습도 필요할 것 같습니다. 처음 하시는 것인만큼 최선을 다해서 연습하시면 writing 실력이 나날이 늘 것이라고 기대하겠습니다! 수고하셨습니다~ ^^ |