▶ Your Answer :
There might be some people who think that
teachers should not express their personal opinion about social and political
issues in class, whereas others do not think this way think differently. Both sides might have
their own ideas to support this view. I personally believe that students can be
exposed to teacher’s opinion about social and political issues. Here are two
reasons as follow for the following two subsequent reasons.
First, giving teacher’s opinion about
issues help helps (ing가 주어일 경우는 동사는 단수 입니다) students aware of the social life problem beyond school boundary. These
days, students are so into their school work to get a good grade for further
academic course or getting advantage of the getting job. I will tell you my personal
experience as an example to clarify my point (이 부분은 너무 구어체이고 이유에 대한 설명이 완벽하게 끝나지 않은체 바로 예시로 넘어갑니다). When I was high school student (나는 고등학교다 라는 의미가 되기 때문에 student를 넣어야 합니다), I had no
interest in the politics because I thought politics is just for grown-up and it
was too serious from my point of view back then. After we were discussing about
what is going on in our neighborhood protest about rubbish disposal factory in
social class, I changed my mind set a lot. Since my social teachers told about
his personal opinion about the issue, I started to look up more information
about it in the internet and I have my own outlook of the social issues. Without him, I would have had a chance to
think about it and known that too. not have found information about the politic issue
Second, student can have a chance to have a
open discussion through exchange their opinion exchanging their opinion. In some culture, It is not recommended to
even bring up the political issues. This is because those Those (this is because는 적절치 않는 표현 입니다) kinds of subject
sometime give se to a lot of argument which sometime ends up with physical
involvement. However, When this delicate subject is dealt with in class with guide,
it lead leads (it는 단수 주어 입니다) to a constructive open discuss and results in good solution too. For
instance, During the election campaign, we can easily see open discussion on
the TV. They usually discuss about quite controversial topic with controller.
To sum up, expressing teacher’s personal opinion
help helps student widen their view point and give gives an chance to constructive
discussion. In this regard, I strongly believe that teacher’s opinion on social
and political issues in class is totally reasonable.
점수: 22 문법적 오류들이 너무 크게 작용합니다. 지금 이 에세이에서 나타나는 가장 큰 오류들은 will could뒤에는 동사 원형이 나와야하고. 단수 복수 주어에 따른 동사 형태에 대한 오류가 많으니 제가 지적한 부분들을 숙지하시길 바랍니다. 또한 어색한 표현이 많습니다. 이러한 표현들은 에세이로 하여금 플로우를 방해하기 때문에 주의하시면서 서술하시길 바랍니다. 수고많으셨습니다. |