▶ Your Answer : It is debatable to which method is the best to prevent cheating in the high school. It is an intriguing question because opinions concerning this issue can be different relying on depending on the individual perspectives. In my opinion, however, I support that giving stronger penalty to chating student is the best way. to cheating should be done for the following two subsequent reasons.
First of all, putting more rigid penalty is the most efficient way to implement than any other way. This is because just Just (this is because는 적절하지 않는 표현 입니다) changing the rule of penalty doesn’t requires does not require (독립형 에세이에서는 줄인말을 서술하면 안됩니다) additional effort to teachers, students, and parents. For example, parents monitor demands parents to observe students in the class, and it is also a burden to teachers, because they have to take responsibility to manage and educate the parents who monitor in exam (이 문장을 통하여서 무엇을 말하려고 하는 것인가요? 설명이 필요해 보입니다). In addition, if the school decided to assign task that students cannot cheat, it can lead to unnecessarily added burden to both students and teachers. To be specific, usually descriptive writhing writing task cannot be cheat, but if the student have to solve this kinds of task that they are not accustomed to, they may be stressful and have less motivated than solving previous kinds of exam. It also requires teachers to make and especially grade in other kinds of exam style. Therefore, giving additional penalty is much better method to prohibit cheating than parents monitor of assigning new types of task.
In addition, giving stronger penalty is the most effective measure to hinder students from cheating. This is because usually Usually (this is because는 적절하지 않는 표현 입니다)people follow the rule or law because they are feeling scared to having disadvantages for breaking the rule. Furthermore, if high school students know that they will be punished with severe penalty, such as getting zero score, or being expelled from school, the rate of cheating in exam would be highly decreased. For example, when I was a high school student, the school implemented rigid rule about cheating, and when the student cheated, the teacher should write that fact on the student’s document, which affects hugely when he or she enter university. Consequently, our school was popular to have few students that cheat in the exam. cheating in the exam
In conclusion, I firmly believe that imposing stronger penalty is the best way to keep students from cheating in exam, because it is the most efficient and effective measure. It is my belief that my opinion regarding this issue has been precisely and effectively delivered with the reasons mentioned above. Never should we forget that this issue may have a huge impact on our future.
점수: 22 전체적으로 설명 부분에 있어서 많이 모호한 독립형 에세이입니다. 특히 이러한 부분은 첫 번째 단락에서 많이 보여집니다. 첫 번째 단락 같은 경우에 있어서는 무엇을 말하려고 하는 것인지 잘 모르겠는 듯한 부분들이 많이 보입니다. 따라서 좀 더 구체적이고 설득력 있게 에세이를 서술하시길 바랍니다. 또한 각 단락들이 서로 너무 장황하게 서술한 거 같습니다. 좀 더 간결하게 자신의 주장을 전달하시길 바랍니다. 수고많으셨습니다. |