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These days, some people take it for granted that students prefer to study alone. However, contrary to in contrast to this idea, it is clear that studying with a group of students is better than studying alone. The compelling logic behind this is that studying with a group of students can help to get a job in the future and to increase their motivations.
To begin with, studying with a group of students can help to get a job in the future. This is mainly because, compared to study alone when comparing to studying alone, students can obtain diverse skills such as giving a presentation in front of audience, sharing their own opinion and managing time. Moreover, as modern society is becoming has become increasingly specialized and competitive, most companies require the job applicants with such attributes. For example, my father, a boss of the electric power corporation, often tells me that the job interview is the most important component in employing people when employing people. My father and other interviewers mainly look at the job applicants' knowledge and multi-tasking skills like discussing and talking with others. This implies that studying with group is a secure way for students to prepare for the future. 아주 논리적으로 잘 풀어나갔습니다. 지금 사회에 이면을 비추면서 왜 사람들이 그룹으로 스터디 해야지 좋은지를 아주 잘 서술하신 거 같습니다. 하지만 문법적 오류들이 있으니 제가 참석 한 것을 보고 참고하시길 바랍니다.
In addition, studing studying with a group of students can increase their motivation. The fundamental reason is that, compared to study alone when comparing to studying alone, a lot of effort to improve their knowledge and satisfaction with it can be a facilitator which motivates students to perform better and to improve themselves. Therefore, this will bring about a good outcome in school. For example, my youngest brother used to be negligent and lost interest in school life. However, since he began to study with his friends in the same mathematics study group, he has changed little by little changed gradually. As a result, he has became could become mature and self-disciplined. The reason was that my brother felt a sense of achievement and confidence by studying with his friends and winning the mathematics contest. Without studying with groups, he would not have been able to obtain a sense of accomplishment.
All things considered, I strongly believe that studying with group of students allows students to get a job in the future and to enhance their motivation. All in all, the importance of studying with others cannot be overestimated in school. Good: 24~30 점수: 26 에세이를 아주 논리적으로 잘 풀어나갔습니다. 특히 바디 1에서 가장 잘 보여주고 있는데. 자신의 이유를 서포트 하기위해 현대 시대적 바탕을 보여준것이 가장 좋은 포인트라고 생각합니다. 논리적으로 잘 풀어나갔기 때문에 본인이 무슨의견을 가지고 있고 그 의견이 타당하다는 것을 에세이를 읽어나가면서 알 수 있게 됬습니다. 하지만 다만 아쉬운점은 위에 첨삭한 부분들을 보시면 문법적 오류들이 있습니다. 보고 참고하시길 바랍니다. 수고많으셨습니다. |